Deadpool & Wolverine (2024)
Ryan Reynolds: Wade Wilson, Deadpool
Photos
Quotes
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Wade Wilson : Your little cinematic universe is about to change, forever!
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Paradox : Mr Wilson, you appear to have soiled yourself while unconscious.
Wade Wilson : I wasn't unconscious.
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Blind Al : Wanna do some cocaine?
Wade Wilson : Hey! Cocaine is the one thing that Feige said is off limits.
Blind Al : What about Bolivian marching powder?
Wade Wilson : They know all the slang terms. They have a list.
Blind Al : Even snowboarding?
Wade Wilson : Even disco dust.
Blind Al : White Girl, Interrupted?
Wade Wilson : Even Forrest Bump.
Blind Al : Do you want to build a snowman?
Wade Wilson : Yes! But I can't!
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Wade Wilson : I am the Messiah. I am Marvel Jesus.
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Deadpool : Fuck you, Fox! I'm going to Disneyland!
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Deadpool : [sees the Alioth storm] OH MY FUCK!
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[Giant-Man's helmet opens, revealing a giant skull]
Deadpool : Huh. Paul Rudd finally aged.
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Wade Wilson : [sees the TVA time sticks] Is that supposed to be scary? Pegging isn't new for me, friendo. But it is for Disney.
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Barman : I told you, you're not welcome here. You're not welcome anywhere. Now get the fuck out of my bar.
Logan : Just give me one more drink, and then I'll leave.
Deadpool : Hi, Peanut. I'm gonna need you to come with me right now.
Logan : Look, lady, I'm not interested.
Deadpool : All right. Well, I'm sort of on the tick-tick, so upsy-daisy, here we go.
[Deadpool lifts Logan off his stool]
Logan : Whoa! Hey, hey!
[Logan draws his claws, but they move slowly]
Deadpool : Oh. Whiskey dick of the claws. It's quite common in Wolverines over 40.
Logan : You don't want this.
[Deadpool pulls out a pistol and points it at Logan's forehead]
Deadpool : Unless you want to take a deep breath through your fucking forehead, I suggest you reconsider.
[Logan laughs and places his forehead against the gun]
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[at the diner]
Logan : Mind putting your mask back on?
Wade Wilson : Super hard to eat while I'm wearing it.
Logan : It's super hard to eat when you're not.
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Deadpool : I am soaking wet right now!
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[as Deadpool and Wolverine start to fight, they hear a cellphone ring]
Wolverine : [to the viewer] Hey, bub! You're in a movie theater, not the ****ing-off room in your mom's nursing home! So, turn your phone to ****ing silent or I'll shove your phone so far up your *** you'll have to answer it through your ****ing ****!
Deadpool : No no no no no! Easy now! So much testosterone! God, when you yell like that, it makes my **** vibrate.
Deadpool : [to the viewer] Listen... just, turn your phones off, or put them on silent, whatever you prefer. I'm gonna take his neck veins for a walk now. Enjoy the film.
[Wolverine walks off, Deadpool follows him]
Deadpool : Nice fourth-wall break back there! I didn't think you had it in you!
Wolverine : Shut your ****ing mouth!
Deadpool : No no no no no, they do not like that word in America, or Canada, or the Netherlands...
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Deadpool : Look, eventually you're gonna hang up the claws. And it's gonna make a lot of people very sad. But one day, your old pal Wade's gonna ask you to get back in the saddle again. And when he does, say yes.
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Wade Wilson : I've always wanted to ride with you, Log!