As you can all see I am in sound mind and body. Sorry I've took the coward's way out. I am hurting. I am disguising a lot of pain, I'm not enjoying it at the moment. That's really it. I don't want to go and waste a wicked life I've had, absolutely suburb. And then the rest of it in pain, trying not to go and end it because it would upset everybody else. I'm not enjoying it, and I do what I want. That is really why I'm not here today. Please don't be sad.