Love Business (1931)

Jackie Cooper: Jackie Cooper

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Jackie : Well, what do you want?

  Chubby : Oh, I was just passing by, thought I'd drop in.

  Jackie : Well, just keep passing by till you come to the river and THEN drop in.

• Farina : You're jus' lovesick, that's all.

  Jackie : I'm a whole epidemic.

• May Wallace Cooper : Well, how's the soup?

  Miss June Crabtree : Oh, it's delicious, only I'm afraid it's a little too rich for me.

  May Wallace Cooper : Oh, I'm sorry.

  Jackie : Tastes like mothballs.

  [Mom kicks Jackie's shin under the table, causing him to swallow a mothball in the soup] 

  Jackie : I swollered it.

  Mary Ann : Tastes like Pa's dress suit smells.

  [Mom repeats shin-kicking business on Mary] 

  Mary Ann : [swallowing a mothball as well]  I did too.

  Wheezer : Tastes more like axle grease.

  [Mom pinches Wheezer] 

  Wheezer : Owwwwwww! Quit pinching me!

• Mary Ann : [seeing Wheezer asleep at the table]  Wheezer! What's the matter with you?

  Wheezer : Aw, I couldn't sleep all night!

  Mary Ann : Couldn't sleep? Why?

  Wheezer : Aw, Jack kept huggin' me an' kissin' me all night, he did.

  Mary Ann : He DID?

  Wheezer : Yeah, an' he kept on saying: "I love you, my darling, I love you, I love you."

  [Wheezer's mom enters with Jackie] 

  May Wallace Cooper : Now, hurry and eat your breakfast or you'll be late for school!

  Wheezer : HEY, DON'T YOU KISS ME!

  Jackie : I'll kiss you with my fist in a minute!

• Jackie : [about Miss Crabtree]  I like the way she walks, and I love the way she dresses, and, oh, boy, how she smells!

  Farina : "Smells?" How come? Does she eat garlic and onions?

  Jackie : No. Sweet and rosy. You know, like, well... ammonia from flowers.

  Stymie : Oh, you mean like a funeral?

  Jackie : No! Not like a funeral! Perfume, like the barber puts on your haircut!

• Jackie : Gee, I thought our first teacher, Miss McGillicuddy, was swell, but Miss Crabtree, boy, she's sweller.

  Stymie : [trying anything to get in on the conversation]  My Pappy's head's all swelled.

  Mary Ann : Well, what made your Pappy's head swell?

  Stymie : My Mammy hit him on the head wid' a monkey wrench.

  Mary Ann : Did it hurt him?

  Stymie : Don't be silly. How could a monkey wrench hurt your head?

• Chubby : Oh, Miss Crabtree, there's something heavy on my heart. I want to ask you something.

  Jackie : [interrupting]  Oh, Chubbsy-Ubbsy, there's gonna be something heavy on your nose!

• Miss June Crabtree : Well, Jackie, how are you?

  Jackie : Gee, you smell like a brand new haircut.

• [news arrives of Miss Crabtree becoming a boarder at Jackie's house] 

  Jackie : Now, wait a minute, fellas. This might not be so hot. Could mean the house is just like Sunday. Gotta wash your neck and ears and slick up all the time.

  Farina : Never thought of that. Even gotta wash your feet before you eat.

  Stymie : I wouldn't wash my feet for nobody.