Libeled Lady (1936)

Jean Harlow: Gladys Benton

Photos 

Quotes 

• Warren Haggerty : Gladys, do you want me to kill myself?

  Gladys : Did you change your insurance?

• Warren Haggerty : They're married, all right.

  Gladys : Oh, but that's arson.

  Warren Haggerty : You mean bigamy.

• Warren Haggerty : Would I ask you to do this thing for me if I didn't consider you practically my wife?

  Gladys : Would you ask your wife to hook up with that ape?

  Bill Chandler : The ape objects.

• Gladys : The things I do for that newspaper!

• Gladys : I don't care who he is. Nobody talks to me like a house detective.

  Warren Haggerty : How do you know how a house detective talks?

  Gladys : Don't you think I read?

• Magistrate : Well I hope you'll be very happy and don't forget to invite me to your silver anniversary.

  Gladys : It'll have to be in the next six weeks!

• Connie Allenbury : Any woman can be starved by neglect. The little attentions Bill paid you seemed so much greater, because you weren't getting them from Haggerty.

  Gladys : The only time Warren ever sent me flowers, he signed Bill's name to the card!

  Connie Allenbury : Exactly! He probably never noticed the clothes you wore, never told you how lovely you looked, the way Bill did.

  Gladys : That's right! How did you know?

  Connie Allenbury : Women can't fool women about men.

• Bill Chandler : [Raises a glass of champagne]  To my little bride.

  Gladys : I hope you choke on it.

  Bill Chandler : Oh, darling.

  Gladys : Don't call me darling. You know what my name is.

  Bill Chandler : Of course - Mrs. William Chandler.

  Gladys : I'd just as soon have a number.

• Gladys : Driver, can't you go any faster?

  Cab Driver : I can lady, but the cab can't.

• Gladys : You can't do this to me, Warren Haggerty. Not to me. First, it was a fire at sea. Then it was a kidnapping. What's the gag this time?

  Warren Haggerty : Darling, there's no gag. The newspaper's made a mistake.

  Gladys : Yeah, well so has little Gladys - engaged to a newspaperman.

• Gladys : Oh, I'm so happy. Today's my wedding day.

  Tiny - Gladys' Maid : What, again, Miss Gladys?

• Gladys : I'll miss my little Billy-kins.

  Bill Chandler : And I'll miss my little fuzzy-face.

  [the bellboy and waiter are standing agape, eating this stuff up] 

• Gladys : [Flowers arrive for her]  For me, Billy-kins?

  Bill Chandler : Yes, my little fuzzy-wuzzy, fuzzy-wuzzy.

  Gladys : Oh, they're lovely. Thank you, sugar pie.

• Gladys : You are a strange egg.

  Bill Chandler : I'll bet you say that to all the boys.

• Bill Chandler : You're a sweet kid, Gladys.

  Gladys : You're not such a cluck yourself.

• Gladys : [to Bill Chandler]  You can't fool me anymore with your hoof, hoof, hoof, or your insomnia, or your publisher. You're a pretty poor sample of a husband.

  [She turns to Warren Haggerty] 

  Gladys : Oh, and you're ten times worse than he is. At least he had some excuse for kicking me around. He was in love with another woman. But you double-crossed me for the sake of a newspaper. Well, marry the paper and be the proud father of a lot of headlines.

• Gladys : I knew I'd find you with a drink in your hand.

  Warren Haggerty : What are you doing here?

  Gladys : Well, what are *you* doing here?

  Warren Haggerty : Didn't Ching tell you?

  Gladys : Yes, Ching told me and I told him and now I'm telling you! I won't stand for it.

• Gladys : For two years, I played second fiddle to this paper.

• Mr. Bane : Hey, didn't they tell you I wanted to see you? Say, what is this? Do I own a paper or a lunatic asylum?

  Gladys : You just took the words right out of my mouth.

• Warren Haggerty : Aw, come on now. You mustn't fight.

  Bill Chandler : Why not? We're married.

  Warren Haggerty : Well, you're supposed to be happily married. You're supposed to be crazy in love with each other.

  Gladys : Yeah, and I must have been crazy to let you marry me off to another guy.

• Bill Chandler : You know, you're one girl in a million.

  Gladys : You don't know the tenth of it.

• Gladys : [Putting on a show for a bellhop and waiter]  Oh, Bee-yill, there's a telegram for you.

  Bill Chandler : [From the bedroom]  Oh, thanks sweetness. Would you open it for me honeykins?

• Warren Haggerty : I tell you I can't go now. The paper's in a jam. We're facing a libel suit!

  Gladys : Well, you're facing a breach of promise suit. If you don't want to marry me, just say so!

  Warren Haggerty : Gladdie, you're getting yourself all upset, darling. Over, here, a little drinkie, maybe?

  Gladys : No, not today I don't. Today I get married!

• Warren Haggerty : Not four hours ago, I heard your two-timing Romeo whispering sweet nothings into the ears of Connie Allenbury. Now what do you think of that?

  Gladys : Bill told me all about it. That's technique, Warren. You wouldn't understand it.

• Gladys : You're so obvious, Warren. Why can't you be subtle, like Bill?

  Warren Haggerty : Are you going to listen to him or are you gonna listen to me?

  Gladys : I'm going to listen to Bill. He knows best.

• Gladys : You'd make your crippled grandmother do a fan dance for that paper.

• Gladys : But I don't want a divorce. I wanna get married and stay married.

• Warren Haggerty : There he is, torn from our arms, the bridegroom of an hour.

  Gladys : Well, that's too long for me.

• Gladys : That's Warren for you. Crazy about me, but boy how he conceals it.

• Gladys : You can't leave me. Bill, you mustn't leave me.

  Bill Chandler : Oh, baby. This is terrible, breaking into our honeymoon like this.

• Gladys : [to Haggerty]  Oh, what a mind. Now I know where you get those stories about working nights.

• Gladys : You dance divinely.

  Bill Chandler : Oh, thanks. There have been complaints.

  Gladys : Then you must've been out with amateurs.

• Gladys : Yes, just as Bill says, and have you smear our names all over your paper, you headline hunter.

• Gladys : I won't be quiet! The things I've taken for that newspaper, Warren Haggerty. But, this gets the blue ribbon. Trying to marry me off to that - to that baboon!

  Bill Chandler : Say, let's not deal in personality.

• Warren Haggerty : It will be all right Gladys.

  Gladys : You mean you're going to leave me here alone?

  Bill Chandler : I'm here.

  Warren Haggerty : Darling, it'll be all right. It's just a business arrangement.

  Gladys : Well, it's mighty funny business if you ask me.

• Gladys : Hey, where are you going?

  Bill Chandler : To get some bed clothes. I'm sleeping out here.

  Gladys : Well...

  Warren Haggerty : You see, it'll be all right. Bill out here. You in there.

  Gladys : Warren Haggerty, do you mean to tell me that you're willing for me, your fiancée, the girl which you love...

  Warren Haggerty : Now, Gladys, please.

  Gladys : Listen, I've done plenty for you and the Evening Star, but, there's a time to draw a line and I'm drawing it!

  Warren Haggerty : Darling, there's nothing to worry about. I tell ya, I trust Bill like he was a brother!

  Gladys : Yeah, but, he isn't my brother!

• Bill Chandler : I just can't make him out. I can understand he's tossing me to the dogs for the paper. But when he does it to the girl he loves!

  Gladys : Who's tossing who to what dogs?

• Gladys : You were all terribly smart, weren't you? You were all building up to a nice happy ending. Haggerty wins his case. Chandler wins his girl. Well? Well, where do I stand? I'll tell you where, right behind the eight ball!