Our Relations (1936)
Stan Laurel: Stan Laurel, Alf Laurel
Photos
Quotes
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Stan : What would you like Bubbles?
Mrs. Betty 'Bubbles' Laurel : Now, don't rush me, lover. I think I'll have a nice Welsh Rarebit.
Joe Grogan : One Welsh Rarebit.
Stan : With cheese.
Joe Grogan : With cheese.
[Double-take stare at Stan]
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Bert Hardy : Garcon? Garcon?
Joe Grogan : What do you mean Garcon? Grogan's the name. What'll you have?
Bert Hardy : Why, I'd like a nice, large, cold flagon of beer.
Joe Grogan : What's yours?
Alf Laurel : Bring me two nice, clean straws that haven't been used.
Joe Grogan : [comes back to the table with beer and straws] That'll be a quarter.
Bert Hardy : A quarter? What for?
Joe Grogan : Ten cents for the beer and fifteen cents for the straws.
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Mrs. Daphne Hardy : [Stops the desert cart] Pardon me.
[to Laurel]
Mrs. Daphne Hardy : Hey you, give me a hand.
[They each pick up a side of a giant birthday cake]
Mrs. Daphne Hardy : One, two, three.
[... and drop it on Hardy's head]
Mrs. Daphne Hardy : Happy Birthday, to you.
Alf Laurel : This isn't his birthday?
Mrs. Daphne Hardy : Never the less - Many Happy Returns. Come on, Betty, this is final!
[Storms off with Betty Laurel]
Bert Hardy : What did you want to go help her for?
Alf Laurel : Well I didn't know what she was going to do.
Bert Hardy : That's right, you wouldn't.
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Stan : Why would they feel like that? Everybody has a black sheep in their closet.
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Alf Laurel : Did you see what I saw?
Bert Hardy : Certainly, You know who they are? They're our twin brothers, Stan and Ollie
Alf Laurel : What are they doing here?
Bert Hardy : I don't know.
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Alf Laurel : What's in the package, Cappy?
Captain of SS Periwinkle : None of your business what's in it! Go on, get outta here. And don't call me Cappy!
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Lily : What are you looking so innocent about?
Stan : I'm not so innocent.
Mrs. Betty 'Bubbles' Laurel : You bet you're not! And if you're as guilty, as I think you are, you ought to be ashamed of yourself!
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Finn : The last time I saw them they had no clothes on.
Mrs. Daphne Hardy : They had no clothes on? Who is this man?
Ollie : I don't know, Mommy, he's an absolute stranger to us, isn't he?
Stan : He certainly is! Who am I - eh, you?
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Drunk : Hello, buddies. What's the trouble now?
Ollie : Oh, we just had a little argument with the wives.
Stan : Yeah, you see, they don't understand us. So we're going to teach them a lesson. Aren't we Ollie?
Ollie : Yes and we're going to stay out - all night!
Stan : Yeah, till nine o'clock.
Drunk : You know that's funny. I'm in the doghouse too!
Ollie : Well, we're all in the same boat!
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Alf Laurel : Well, what do you think we better do?
Bert Hardy : That's entirely up to you. You thought of a way to get us into this mess. Now, think of a way to get us out of it.
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Bert Hardy : [Stranded in a hotel with no clothes, Laurel suggests they dress up like the "fellas that look like Eskimos" in "Singapore" - using bed quilts and towels as their set of clothes] That sounds screwy to me. But, any old port in a storm.
Alf Laurel : It might be a good idea.
Bert Hardy : You've gotta be right once in your life!
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Alf Laurel : What'd he say?
Bert Hardy : I don't know?
Man wearing a Turban : Don't you speak Arabic?
Bert Hardy : Oh, no sir. We're a couple of Singapore Eskimos.
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Alf Laurel : Funny looking dames, aren't they?
Bert Hardy : I don't know. I kinda like that big, fat blonde.
Alf Laurel : The little one wasn't so bad.
Bert Hardy : They're cute.
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Bert Hardy : What's the matter? We can explain everything?
Alice : You can't explain those two old cronies!
Alf Laurel : They're not old cronies. They're a couple of old welfare workers.
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Alice : Well, sit down and have a drink.
Bert Hardy : We will as soon as we get rid of these two old battle-axes.
Alf Laurel : Yeah, we'll soon get rid of them.
[the two old battle-axes walk up behind them]
Alice : Is that so!
Bert Hardy : Oh, we want you to meet the two girls we met this afternoon.
Alf Laurel : Yeah, Lily and Alice.
Mrs. Daphne Hardy : I know all about them - you ungrateful hound!
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Finn : Before, it was two to one. Now, it's three to two. That makes it even.
Alf Laurel : You must be balmy. We haven't seen you since...
Finn : Balmy, am I! At 'em boys!
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Alf Laurel : You're sure lookin' good, Stanley. But, how you have altered.
Stan : You've altered too, but, you haven't changed a bit.