- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: [In ambulance] Now we're going to the hospital, and we 're going to live happily ever after.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Now we're going to MacArther's gym. I'm gonna get Mike to give you a few boxing lessons.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: There were two of them.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: That is no excuse for leading with your right.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Darling, it's a hangover from cave man days, and it has no place in a civilized mind.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Do you really believe all of that?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Why, certainly I do. Listen, if you ever catch me being jealous, I give you leave to put on your tiger skin, pick up your club and beat me back to my senses.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Ohhh, it might be fun.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Yes, but I'll never give you the chance to find out.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: But you see, all I'm asking you is one hour out of your life. You probably will live over 350,000 more hours. So, you see? All I ask is a tiny little hour.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Mr. Cassil, you don't need to come here anymore.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Oh, I'm coming here every day.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Oh no you're not.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Oh, yes I am.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Oh, I wouldn't if I were you.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: I'm sure I'm going to feel much better.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: [Feeling his chest] No talking, please... Very unusual. Would you like to listen to it, doctor?
- [She puts on her stethoscope]
- Dr. Gunther: No, no, you go ahead.
- Dr. Gunther: [Looking at Jane's note after she checks Andre's heart] Oh, really?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: I'm afraid so.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Did you hear anything good?
- Dr. Gunther: Do you drink very much, Mr. Cassil?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: No, no. A little wine. Sometimes a little bandy.
- Dr. Gunther: Dr. Alexander may have to stop all of that.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Yes, Dr. Alexander certainly will.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Mr. Cassil, I would suggest for the time being that you give up liquor, not play so hard, and get more sleep.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: [as Dr. Jane puts the stethoscope on his chest] This part I like very much.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: No talking, please.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: When we were married, you knew that I was a doctor and that I was going on with my work.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Yes, but I didn't know I would have to make an appointment every time I wanted to see you.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: I really think it's a matter of fatigue.
- Dr. Gunther: Too much work!
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Too much play!
- Dr. Jane Alexander, Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Are you afraid I'd be jealous?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Well, that was sort of the idea.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: But I'm never jealous.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Most women are.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Oh, that's because they don't understand it. You know, jealousy is a very simple thing. Physiologically, it's merely the adrenal glands pumping adrenaline into the bloodstream. Of course, it has a psychological trigger... ..
- Dr. Gunther: Dr. Alexander is my assistant. I like to watch these young ones - see their methods. They sometimes can teach us old fellows a thing or two.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Oh, I don't doubt that about Dr. Alexander at all.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Oh, go ahead and cry, darling. But remember, I directed you in five plays. So I know all your tricks. If you insist, I can sit here and watch you perform until you collapse But I will not fall for it.
- Nancy Benson: How dare you do this to me. Why, for all the years I...
- [Train whistle drowns discussion]
- Dr. Jane Alexander: I don't think that you'd pose any very interesting symptoms. Could be pure imagination.
- Dr. Gunther: Yes, uh, cardiac hysteria's a rather common thing.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Have you ever been on a diet, Mr. Cassil?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: No, no. I always say it's not what you eat, but with whom you eat. Is that not so, doctor?
- Dr. Gunther: Well, philosophers say the best part of a good dinner is a good companion.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: There you are.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Would you hop up and down on one foot, please?
- Leading Woman: He's with the doctor again.
- Minor Role: But aren't they wiring a play about a hospital, George?
- George Hastings: Well right now, he's not writing a play at all -- he's making one.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: You say you're having a little trouble with your heart?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Yes, doctor.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Oh, I think it's probably occupational disease. He probably overworks it.
- Dr. Gunther: Yes, I know. I've seen many of your plays, Mr. Cassil.. Very entertaining. Very amusing.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Thank you, sir.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: [after arriving at a restaurant with an emergency ambulance] Is this your idea of a joke?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: No. Dr. Gunther's prescription. He said I should for dinner have a pleasant companion.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: You know, you really ought to be ashamed of yourself.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Well, in a way I am. But I've tried everything else I know - theater tickets, opera tickets, two-pitch telegrams, perfume. You don't even wear it.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Did you know, by any chance, that it's a criminal offense to put in a false ambulance call?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Why, Mr. Cassil, what are you doing up so early in the morning?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Well, yesterday you stuck me, you poked me, you listened to me tick, so today I'm back to find out - how am I?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Disgustingly healthy. You will probably live to a ripe old age unless somebody shoots you.
- Nurse Gibbons: And that's liable to happen any minute.
- Dr. Gunther: How are you, Mr. Cassil?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Never felt better in my life. Uh, that is, until last night. Yes, last night I just went to pieces.
- Dr. Gunther: What seems to be your trouble, Mr. Cassil?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: I believe it's my heart, doctor. Yes, I find it very difficult to go to sleep.
- Dr. Gunther: I see. You don't mind if I watch your examination of the patient, do you, Dr. Alexander?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Why, no, not at all.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Now, what was it you wanted to tell me about?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Now, when everything is over, you finally take notice of your husband -- behave like a cave woman.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Good morning.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: [They kiss] Good morning.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Hope I'm not too early.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: No, no. I always get up in the middle of the night to have breakfast.
- O'Leary: [Andre Cassil's butler waking Andre in the morning] Mr. Cassil!
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: What is it?
- O'Leary: It's Mrs. Cassil, sir. She's come to have breakfast with you.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Hmmm, what?
- O'Leary: Your wife, sir. She's here, for breakfast.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Breakfast?
- [Yawning]
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: What time is it?
- O'Leary: It's almost quarter of...
- [he swallows]
- O'Leary: seven, sir.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Almost quarter of seven... . IN THE MORNING? Get out of here before I kill you.
- O'Leary: Yes, sir. Shall I tell madam you're not accustomed to having breakfast before 12, sir?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: She doesn't believe in jealousy.
- George Hastings: She's gotta believe in something. Look here. Act 1 - Wife won't play house. Act 2 - Husband makes wife jealous. Act 3 - They wind up in each other's arms. Curtain falls, dream boat. It's a cinch. It's sure fire.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Too old-fashioned. Go back to sleep.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: [Walking into elevator] Seventeen.
- Gus: [the elevator operator] Shall we wait for 22B?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: No... . I suppose you think I'm crazy.
- Gus: Now wait a minute, mister, I didn't say a word. You can't report me. When I took this job, they told me, whatever the tenants do, that's their own business. If you wanna be crazy that's all right with me. Seventeen... watch your step.
- Edith Meredith: Oh, you have a wonderful view. I have a wonderful view form my place, too. It's on 66th Street.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Mmm.
- Edith Meredith: Mm hmm. You can see the Hudson River. If, um, if you ever get tired of looking at the East River, you can come up to my place and... look out my window... and see the Hudson River.
- Michael Dailey: She did say her husband, didn't she?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Yes, she did say her husband.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Yes, Michael, we're married.
- Michael Dailey: I don't like that at all. I walk around the corner. Go to Brazil, and the moment my back is turned, you marry the first beggar that comes along. Pardon me old fellow.
- [Looking at Andre]
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: If he had said 'old fellow' one more time, I think I would have killed him with my bare hands.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: It's a good thing you didn't try because he has muscles like an ox.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Oh. Oh, he has muscles like an ox?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: He's really very nice, Andre.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil, Dr. Jane Alexander: It's a matter of whether or not you like oxes.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Ox-en.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Oxen - terrible word.
- Michael Dailey: [to Dr. Jane Alexander] I think you made a great mistake in getting married at all. A brilliant career in medicine. Don't laugh. Might have turned out to be a great doctor.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: But I'm still practicing.
- Michael Dailey: [He turns to Andre] Can't even support you, huh?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Now, wait my friend.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Oh, no, Michael.
- Michael Dailey: I don't see what you want to live in New York for anyway. Much better off as a doctor on one of my expeditions. Much more excitement than this. Really have a chance to try new things. Catch new microbes. Go into jungle. Sail the seven seas. Fight epidemics with one hand, natives with the other, and you foul all that up to marriage here in New York living in a little couped up apartment.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Two apartments.
- Michael Dailey: All right, two apartments, six apartments, what difference does it make? Why two apartments?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: It's a long story and we don't wanna go into it now.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: You know, Michael is an explorer. He goes to all kinds of weird places, and meets all kinds of weird people.
- Michael Dailey: You don't have to go very far - you meet them everywhere... Two apartments?
- [Looking at Andre]
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: [Shaking Hastings, who's in bed] I married a monster.
- George Hastings: What?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: I said, I married a monster.
- George Hastings: [Getting out of bed] This better be good.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Stay in bed. My wife eats breakfast at 7 in the morning. Ham, eggs, oatmeal. Then she walks to work - one mile. And if I'm dressed, she's going to let me walk with her. What can I do?
- George Hastings: Shoot her.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: I love her:
- George Hastings: Then shoot yourself.
- Michael Dailey: Oh, uh, by the way, you know, while I'm still in the States, I'm going to do everything I possibly can to break up your marriage. Uh huh, huh, huh, huh. Don't say I didn't warn you old fellow.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: You're making a very good start.
- Michael Dailey: Oh, I can do a lot better than this.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Would you like to hear some music?
- Edith Meredith: Oh, sure, put it on... .I'll turn off the lights.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Hmm?
- Edith Meredith: Well, I can hear better in the dark.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: I don't like his being here.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Why not? He's a friend of mine. Look, I don't object to your having your friends, like Miss Meredith.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: I know you don't. That's the trouble with you.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: On, now, George. Please be serious now.
- George Hastings: At 8 o'clock in the morning?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Not only that - she has her own apartment - five floors up.
- George Hastings: Say that again, slower.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: She lives on the 22nd floor. I live on the 17th floor. And she won't come down.
- George Hastings: She won't?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: No. And I won't go up.
- George Hastings: What do you want me to do? You don't need a producer. You need a lawyer.
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Andre, look. The most important thing is for our marriage to last.
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: You think so?
- Dr. Jane Alexander: Yes!
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Well, I think the most important thing is for our marriage to begin.
- Gus: [the elevator operator] 17?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: Nope, 22.
- Gus: Are you sure you don't wanna go to 17?
- Andre 'Pappy' Cassil: No, heh, heh, 22 please. I thought you were not to interfere with the tenants.
- Gus: Oh, I didn't say a thing. If you wanna go to 22, it'll be 22.