Hard Boiled Mahoney (1947)

Byron Foulger: Prof. Quizard

Quotes 

• Prof. Quizard : How many hairs are there on the human head?

  Sach : Who's head?

  Prof. Quizard : Why, the average human head.

  Bobby : That leaves YOU out.

  Slip Mahoney : So what happens if we answer de question?

  Prof. Quizard : Well, you know, if you guess right we give you oodles of prizes.

  Slip Mahoney : Oh, dere's "oodles" of prizes. That's different. Think hard, Sach! There might be somethin' in it for us.

  Sach : Well, let's see.

  [Horace scratches his head] 

  Prof. Quizard : Oh-oh, no fair counting.

  Sach : Oh, I got the answer. One.

  Prof. Quizard : Oh, no, doctor. There are thousands.

  Sach : Yeah? My Uncle Herman has an average head and he's only got one hair in it.

• Prof. Quizard : I'll be back on the air next week, broadcasting from the sanitarium.