Slick Hare (1947)

Dave Barry: Humphrey Bogart

Quotes 

• Bogart : [Closing lines]  Well, time's up, shorty. Where's my rabbit?

  Elmer Fudd : Pwease, Mr. Bogart. I couldn't get a wabbit. I twied and I twied.

  Bogart : Oh, yeah? Well, I guess there's just one thing left for me to do.

  [reaches into his coat pocket] 

  Elmer Fudd : Don't! Pwease, don't!

  Bogart : [Pulling out a handkerchief to wipe his brow]  Baby will just have to have a ham sandwich, instead.

  Bugs Bunny : Baby?

  [Bugs comes out of his hiding place and hops onto Bogart's table, placing himself on the dinner plate as the main course. Sitting there is "Baby" - Lauren Bacall] 

  Bugs Bunny : Remember, garçon. The customer is always right. If it's rabbit baby wants, rabbit baby gets.

  [Bugs then howls and wolf whistles at Bacall] 

• Bugs Bunny : [Disguised as waiter]  One lemon meringue pie!

  Elmer Fudd : One wemon mewingue pie coming up!

  [Goes behind counter and gets pie] 

  Elmer Fudd : Pick up pie!

  Bugs Bunny : [enters kitchen, picks up pie]  Roger!

  [Enters again and hits Elmer in face with pie] 

  Bugs Bunny : Your pie, sir!

  [Leaves and enters again] 

  Bugs Bunny : One banana cream pie!

  [Leaves] 

  Elmer Fudd : One banana cweam pie coming up! Pick up pie!

  Bugs Bunny : [Same as before]  Roger! Your pie, sir! One coconut custard pie with whipped cream!

  Elmer Fudd : One coconut custard pie with whipped cweam coming up! Say, you know what I think? I think that's the wabbit. Well, he who waughs wast... He he he! Pick up pie!

  Bugs Bunny : Rogerini!

  [as Bugs enters, Elmer throws the pie; Bugs ducks and the pie goes over his head; Enter Bogart with pie on his face] 

  Bogart : Why did you hit me in the face with a coconut custard pie with whipped cream?

  Elmer Fudd : Pwease, Mr. Bogart...!

  Bogart : Now listen, chubby. You got just five more minutes to get me my rabbit. Get me?

• Bogart : Hey, waiter. C'mere.

  Elmer Fudd : Yes sir, Mr. Bogart. Ah, we have some vewy nice...

  Bogart : Cut the gab and bring me an order of fried rabbit.

  Elmer Fudd : Oh, I'm vewy sorry, Mr. Bogart. But we're just fwesh out of wabbit. Heh-heh-heh-heh. We got some vewy nice Cwepe Suzzette.

  Bogart : [Picking up Elmer by the lapels]  I said I want rabbit, and I'll give you just 20 minutes to bring it, or else.

  [lays a gun on the table] 

  Elmer Fudd : [nervous]  Yes, sir, Mr. Bogart. The customer is always wight. Heh-heh-heh, heh-heh.