Two Gophers from Texas (1948)
Mel Blanc: Mac, Dog
Quotes
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[Opening lines]
Dog : Egad, what a book. It intrigues me. Poochie biscuit. Bah! I crave the tangy zest of wild game, for within me beats the heart of a big game hunter. I hear the call of the wild. With this book to guide me, I shall roam the woodland in search of me own sustenance; food in the raw.
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Dog : [reading] "Number four: If all else fails," - and it has - "you must utilize the gopher's love of music." Music! Egad, what a book.
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Dog : Odds bodikins! Two ferocious gophers. Me first conquest!
[rushes over to Mac and Tosh, who run to their hole]
Tosh : After you.
Mac : No, please. After you.
Tosh : No, no, no, no, no. I insist. Age before beauty, you know.
Mac : Now, don't be a sil. Go ahead.
Tosh : Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Let's be sensible. You first, please.
Mac : I have it! Let's go together.
Tosh : Shall we?
Mac : Surely.
[They both dive into the hole, as the dog passes by and crashes into the trees and down a cliff]
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[the dog is pretending to be a crying baby in a basket]
Tosh : Oh, dear, dear, dear! Tsk tsk tsk. A homeless waif. How sad. Oh, we should do something for him.
Mac : Yes, yes, you're right.
Tosh : He cries a great deal, doesn't he?
Mac : Well, there are two things that make a baby cry. One is when he's hungry.
Tosh : Well, this one doesn't look hungry.
Mac : Do you suppose...?
Tosh : It might be, it might be.
[They look under his blanket, exposing a hidden arsesnal]
Dog : [Covering up] Goo!
Mac : Oh, we must take care of little Snookie.
Tosh : Le'ts do something nice for him.
[they push the basket up the hill]
Mac : Does little baby want nice gophers to take him for a wong, wong wide, hmm?
[They reach a cliff]
Mac : Do you think we should?
Tosh : Lets.
[They push the dog down the cliff, where he crashes at the bottom; he gets up and dusts himself off]
Dog : Obviously, they did not reckon on me great inner strength.
[Suddenly freezes up with a goofy look on his face and falls down, stiff as a board]
