The Mouse That Roared (1959)
Austin Willis: United States Secretary of Defense
Quotes
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Tully Bascombe : We want a million dollars.
United States Secretary of Defense : You mean a billion dollars.
Tully Bascombe : No, sir, no. Just a million.
United States Secretary of Defense : You can't expect us to give you a measly million? That's less than we spent in Germany on one city alone.
Tully Bascombe : Yes, but you see, sir, they lost.
United States Secretary of Defense : Oh. I can't promise to get that through. You may have to take a billion.
Tully Bascombe : Well, if you could try, sir.
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United States Secretary of Defense : Hurry please. I can't keep the President waiting. And don't forget that Declaration of War.
Army Captain : No, sir.
United States Secretary of Defense : Fine thing. The United States and the Grand Duchy of Fenwick are at war and it takes the FBI to find out about it.
Army Captain : Yes, sir. The Declaration was found behind the radiator in that fellows office in the State Department. Wasn't sir?
United States Secretary of Defense : Yes, sir. I mean, yes. Anyway, Chester wouldn't like it on the island of Yap. But, how am I going to tell the President that we've been successfully invaded by a bunch of 15th Century Europeans?
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United States Secretary of Defense : The Russians have offered 20 divisions and have told Fenwick they want an answer within 48 hours.
American General at the Pentagon : Well, we'll give 'em 30 divisions.
United States Secretary of Defense : General, you don't seem to appreciate our position. We're at war with Fenwick. How can we send troops to protect our enemy?
American General at the Pentagon : Hey, you know somethin'? We're stuck.
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United States Secretary of Defense : Admittedly we are at war with Grand Fenwick and legally entitled to attack. But, do you want it recorded in history that a nation of our size attacked the smallest country in the world?
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United States Secretary of Defense : America wants nothing more than peace. Always has.
