One, Two, Three (1961)

Howard St. John: Wendell P. Hazeltine

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Otto muddles his coached answers] 

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : How is the situation here in Berlin?

  Otto Ludwig Piffl : It shouldn't happen to a dog! Uh, I - I mean, it's a draw! Actually, the situation is hopeless, but not serious.

• C.R. MacNamara : [On the phone with headquarters in Atlanta]  And how about the Russian deal? Napoleon blew it, Hitler blew it, but Coca Cola's gonna' pull it off.

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : Forget it, MacNamara. Forget it. We are not interested in doing business behind the Iron Curtain.

  C.R. MacNamara : We're not interested in the Russian market?

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : I wouldn't touch the Russians with a ten-foot pole... and I don't want anything to do with the Poles, either.

• Wendell P. Hazeltine : [On the phone, talking to MacNamara]  She's flyin' Pan Am. The plane is due in Berlin at 4:30. Unless those damn Commies shoot it down.

• [MacNamara is at his desk when the phone rings. He picks it up] 

  C.R. MacNamara : Yes?

  [Looks ahead and waves his umbrella] 

  C.R. MacNamara : It's Atlanta. Hello? Hello? Mr. Hazeltine? Yes, I can hear you. I'm fine, Mr. Hazeltine. How are you?

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : Well if you must know, I'm miserable. Those damn magnolias are in bloom again and so is my hay fever!

  [Hazeltine takes a tissue and wipes his nose] 

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : MacNamara, there's something important I'd like to discuss with you.

  C.R. MacNamara : [With enthusiasm]  I thought you would, Mr. Hazeltine. You got my teletype?

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : [Holds up a piece of paper]  It's right here in front of me. Those figures from May are not bad, not bad at all.

  C.R. MacNamara : [With glee]  Thank you, sir! And how about the Russian deal? Napoleon blew it. Hitler blew it. But Coca-Cola's gonna pull it off!

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : Forget it, MacNamara, forget it! We are not interested in doing business behind the Iron Curtain!

  C.R. MacNamara : [With shock]  We're not interested in the Russian Market?

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : I wouldn't touch the Russian with a ten foot pole! And I don't want anything to do with the Poles, either!

  C.R. MacNamara : But this could be the biggest thing for the company since we introduced the six-pack!

  [MacNamara is silent for a few seconds as his enthusiasm suddenly drops] 

  C.R. MacNamara : ...well, if it's against front office policy.

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : You're damn right! But that's not what I called you about. Look MacNamara, I need you to do me a big personal favor.

  C.R. MacNamara : [Put out]  Yes, Mr. Hazeltine. You want me to ship Mrs. Hazeltine another set of Meissen China?

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : No, it's about our daughter, Scarlett. She's seventeen, now, sweet girl. Fell in love with some damn rock and roll singer. No, that was the one before. This is some pimple-faced basketball player. Anyway, we sent her off on a little trip to Europe.

  [Hazeltine wipes his nose again] 

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : Where was I?

  C.R. MacNamara : Daughter Scarlet, pimple faced basketball player, sent her to Europe...

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : Oh yes! We had her spend a couple of weeks with our representative in Rome. And a couple of weeks with our man in Paris, and she's arriving in Berlin this afternoon. So I would appreciate it if you and Mrs. MacNamara...

  C.R. MacNamara : Oh we'd be delighted to have her stay with us. It's just that... uh... my family has made some plans, and... I have a few plans of my own.

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : Well if it's any sort of imposition, never mind. I'm sorry I called you.

  C.R. MacNamara : Actually, I wasn't thinking of myself. It's your daughter I'm concerned about. With the political situation in Berlin the way it is, anything can happen, anytime.

  Wendell P. Hazeltine : Exactly! That's why I want you to take especially good care of her! She's just a child really, and I don't like her to stay at a hotel alone at a time like this. She's flying Pan Am, the plane is due in Berlin at 4:30, unless those damn Commies shoot it down!