- Monseigneur Marguerite: My God, I was so young! I already knew that to love the world you would have to get away from it.
- Le capitaine Adolf Hitler: Shall we burn the town, sir?
- Le Colonel Helmut von Krack: Later, Adolf. Later.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: I wonder, sir, if you have the right Plumpick, sir. You see, I'm an ornithology specialist.
- Le Colonel Alexander MacBibenbrook: This calls for a specialist, Pumpernickel.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: Plumpick.
- Le Colonel Alexander MacBibenbrook: Nickel!
- Le Duc de Trèfle: I'm the Duke of Clubs.
- Monseigneur Marguerite: Monseigneur Marguerite.
- Le Duc de Trèfle: Come, my friend. Tell them who you are.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: King of Hearts!
- Le Duc de Trèfle: You Majesty!
- Monseigneur Marguerite: Such an honor!
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: I'll tell you my secret. I live for the moment. That's what counts.
- Le Colonel Alexander MacBibenbrook: Vive la France!
- Le Général Géranium: Vive la France? Vive la France? Vive la France?
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: The cage door is open!
- [lion roars]
- Le Général Géranium: He's used to being caged. He won't come out! That's for him to decide. The king of beasts.
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Shall I dress as a housewife, a mummy or nun?
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: Okay this way. Listen, sit down and don't move. Are you a whore?
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Yes!
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: And I'm a customer?
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Yes.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: Good. We understand each other.
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: I'm not the girl for you. I'll get you one. Marble Pussy or Rosie, Groping Gerty or Coquelicot. The choice is yours.
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Blush! Men go for that.
- Coquelicot: Do I frighten him?
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Sure. Men seem tough, but they're soft as asparagus. Teeny babies at heart.
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Charles, enter.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: Staying with us?
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: To take the chill off, tell you of birds and bees.
- Coquelicot: You don't know how? Neither do I.
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: This is the bedroom. The bed. The lamp. The switch. I suggest a quiet moment. Then turn the light on. Examine the object of your desire carefully. Turn the light off again. Love is played like chess, black and white.
- Coquelicot: Will he get naked?
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Yes. Don't be lewd. There's booze. I'll draw the curtains.
- Coquelicot: What would you like?
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: To lose my memory.
- Coquelicot: It's easy.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: Where are we going?
- Le Duc de Trèfle: To the cathedral. 12th century. A bit restored, like my wife.
- Le Duc de Trèfle: What ails you? This is a sacred moment and you're wiggling. Do you have to pee-pee?
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: [kisses the sleeping King of Hearts] He tastes of raspberries.
- La Duchesse: [kisses the King] Ripe raspberries. The way I like them.
- Le Général Géranium: I wouldn't mind seeing the Duke cuckolded.
- Le Duc de Trèfle: Cuckolded? Who?
- La Duchesse: Nobody dear.
- Le Duc de Trèfle: We need a cuckold for the sake of the town's equilibrium.
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: What curls!
- La Duchesse: She'll have to stick out her chest more. Head still. Only the legs move.
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: Some blue on the eyelids. An orange blossom in her bosom.
- Coquelicot: Can't I go as I am?
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine, La Duchesse: What a good idea!
- Coquelicot: What's under their kilts?
- Monseigneur Marguerite: Nothing!
- Madame Eva alias Madame Eglantine: You mean everything!
- Monsieur Marcel: It's your turn, Your Majesty.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: I still don't understand the rules.
- Monseigneur Marguerite: There aren't any.
- Monsieur Marcel: So nice of you to come.
- Le soldat Charles Plumpick alias le roi de coeur: You pay customers?
- Monsieur Marcel: Yes. That's why business is good.