Phil Hartman: Various, Announcer, Charlton Heston, Bill Clinton, Frank Sinatra, Peter Graves, Ronald Reagan, Ted Kennedy, Burt Reynolds, Frankenstein, Barbara Bush, Donald Trump, Ed McMahon, Frankenstein's Monster, Michael Eisner, Pat Buchanan, Phil Donahue, Self, Spokesperson, Bill Franklin, Jack Nicholson, Michael, Mr. Chapman, Self - Host, Singing Cowboy, Steve, Superman, Waiter, announcer, A.J. Tacks Clammer, Abraham Lincoln, Abraham Lincoln Statue, Albert Goldman, Alonzo, Andy Rooney, Arthur Hensen, Barney the Dinosaur, Beldar Conehead, Benjamin Franklin, Billy, Bing Crosby, Bob Packwood, Bobby Coultsman, Cable announcer, Captain, Cashier, Charlston Heston, Charlton Heston as Detective Thorn, Chet Masters, Chia Head Client, Chick HazardVarious, Clayton Dalton, Client, Co-Worker, Craig W. Doyle, Customer, David Brinkley, Dick Button, Director, Dispatcher, Don, Don Bingham, Don Keister, Don Tattaglia, Dr. Jacob Hoffritz, Dr. McCoy, Dr. Watson, Drunk Father, Earl Holliman as Sergeant Crowley, Edward, Elton John, Eugene, Father, Fay Vincent, Frank Bartles, Frank Gifford, Gabriel García Márquez, General Lee, Genghis Khan, Giant Businessman, Gil Madaman, Godfrey, Governor Danforth, Gregory, Guest, Gymnast, Hassan Qafuri-Fard, Hicks, Host, Isaac Asimov, Jack Hadey, James Bond, James Stockdale, Jesus, Jesus Christ, Jim Bakker, Jim Bowie, Jimmy 'The Greek' Snyder, Jimmy Johnson, Jimmy Swaggart...