Columbo (TV Series)

A Matter of Honor (1976)

Peter Falk: Columbo

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lt. Columbo : You know, I think my wife was right. Something wrong with me. Supposed to be on vacation, and right away I'm thinking like a cop. That's called, uh, occupational hazard.

  Jaime : "Occupational hazard?" Uh, what is that?

  Lt. Columbo : That's, uh, when wherever you go you take your work with you.

  Jaime : Oh, I see. Uh, we call that "loco."

• Commandant Sanchez : I have to go, Lieutenant. There's been a terrible accident out at the Montoya Ranch. Maybe you'd like to accompany me? We could talk on the way over.

  Lt. Columbo : My wife is waiting at the hotel.

  Commandant Sanchez : All right. I understand. You know, I was thinking that, uh, maybe we could speed up the paperwork on your accident - but, of course, you have to go to your wife, that's all.

  Lt. Columbo : That sounds like blackmail.

  Commandant Sanchez : Lieutenant, would I do such a thing to a fellow police officer?

• Lt. Columbo : Let's start with small things. Let's finish our coffee.

• Lt. Columbo : [to Sanchez]  No, the bull was the murder weapon, sir, like a gun.

• Lt. Columbo : Is that the autopsy?

  Commandant Sanchez : That's the weather report.

  Lt. Columbo : [trying to read it]  It's in Spanish.

  Commandant Sanchez : Yes, I know that. The people at the weather bureau speak it very well.

• Jaime : [regarding a piece of splintered wood]  That is not from a pick, señor. That is from a lance.

  Lt. Columbo : Well, what's the difference?

  Jaime : The picks are used in the ring. They have metal tips to wound the bull, lower his head.

  Lt. Columbo : And the lance?

  Jaime : They are used in the fields by the vaqueros for herding. They are made of pine, not so strong.

  Lt. Columbo : Well, now I'm puzzled.

• Commandant Sanchez : [sees Columbo reading a book on bullfighting]  learning anything?

  Lt. Columbo : oh, I have to learn something because I didn't know anything to start with.

• Lt. Columbo : Actually, I thought if I got the chance I'd like to come out here one more time before I left. I'm fascinated by everything out here, but I don't want to be a pest.

  Luis Montoya : Oh, not at all, Lieutenant. You're welcome here anytime.

  Lt. Columbo : Well, thank you very much, sir. I've been fascinated by everything I've seen out here and I still think there's a lot to learn.

• [Lt. Columbo recommends Commandante Sanchez order an autopsy on Hector Rangel] 

  Commandant Sanchez : Lieutenant, I can see the newspapers: "Don Luis Montoya, the Idol of Mexico, a Murder Suspect?"

  Lt. Columbo : That's your problem. I'm just a tourist here.

  Commandant Sanchez : Yeah, that's my problem. You know, a policeman who jeopardizes his pension, he must be loco, right?

• Lt. Columbo : [referring to bullfighting]  I don't know how you fight those things to make a living.

  Luis Montoya : It's more than a living, Lieutenant. It's a way of life.

  Lt. Columbo : I'll tell you the truth, uh, I don't think I would enjoy watching a man kill an animal like that, as big and as mean as he is.

  Luis Montoya : Perhaps you do enjoy the spectacle of two men in the prize ring beating each other senseless, or murdering an innocent deer with a rifle, or catching a fish with another one which is still alive. Our culture is different than yours, Lieutenant. No better or worse, perhaps, but, uh, different.

• Commandant Sanchez : If there is a crime here, I want to get to the bottom of it. Better yet, I would like YOU to get to the bottom of it.

  Lt. Columbo : Me?

• Commandant Sanchez : Montoya must have a motive.

  Lt. Columbo : Yes, every man has a motive.

• Lt. Columbo : May I ask you a personal question, sir?

  Luis Montoya : Oh, by all means.

  Lt. Columbo : Did you injure your leg in the bullring?

  Luis Montoya : [nodding]  On the Plaza Del Toros, Mexico. It was the wound that ended my career. And, ironically, it wasn't even the bull I was supposed to fight. You see, I was appearing mano a mano with a young matador who froze, and the bull gored him. I jumped to his rescue, and I, too, was gored. Badly. Here. They tried to take me to the infirmary along with the young matador, but I refused to go. Despite the blood flowing from my wound, I stayed in the ring and I did one of the best faenas of my career. I killed the bull with one thrust. The people loved it! They stood up and gave me an electrifying ovation. Two ears and a tail! That was my last fight.

  Lt. Columbo : Well, that must have taken a lot of courage, sir.

• Lt. Columbo : [to Sanchez]  Yes, I can see that, but it's important to be thorough - especially when a man dies alone.

• Commandant Sanchez : A bull like Marinaro, how much he worth?

  Luis Montoya : $8,000 - more with inflation.

  Lt. Columbo : Seems like a valuable piece of property to destroy without permission.

• Lt. Columbo : I'll tell you the truth. I got a crazy notion I know why Rangel was killed.

  Commandant Sanchez : What?

  Lt. Columbo : Trouble is I don't think anybody's gonna believe me.

• Lt. Columbo : What is this "pinchazo in the glodio?"

  Commandant Sanchez : [correcting]  "Gluteo." That's a puncture in the buttocks.

  Lt. Columbo : Well, did the bull get him there, too?

• Lt. Columbo : That's some baby!