User Reviews

Talking to a family friend about Horror movies that they were searching for on DVD,I was surprised to hear them give details about a film,which sounded like a more extreme take on an under rated Slasher Thriller called Eyes of a Stranger.Searching round on Amazon UK,I was pleased to find,that along with the cut UK edition of the movie,a completely uncut version of the film had also come out on DVD in the US,which lead to me deciding that this would be a call worth listening in to.

The plot:

Hearing on the news about the police discovering his 5th rape/murder victim,serial killer Kirk Smith decides to celebrate by phoning up a local radio station,and talk to the host of a psychologist program called Dr.Lindsay Gale.Putting on a fake voice and using the name "Ramone",Smith is thrilled to hear Gale give him a nervous reaction,until Lindsay begins to ask "Ramone" if he has taken the medical advice that she gave him,when "Ramone" last phoned up the show.Angered over Gale ruining his fun,Smith decides that is time for him to start searching for a new victim.

Being placed by their chief officer as the investigators of the mysterious serial killer's spree,Lt. Chris McCabe and Sgt.Hatcher find themselves completely out of their dept in predicting the killer's next move.Focusing on doing extensive evidence gathering at the murder scenes,and also knocking down a number of doors,McCabe and Hatcher begin to suspect that the killer might be a fan of a local radio show…

View on the film:

Before getting to the movie itself,I first have to give a special mention to the Scorpion Releasing DVD,which along with offering a terrific,clean uncut print of the film,also fill the DVD with a number of very informative extras,which include a great commentary by Co- producer/Co-writer/ (along with Michael Castle and actor Nicolas Worth) director Robert Hammer-who sounds like one of the most mild mannered directors of the last 20 years!.

Shooting his first,and only film in 18 days,Hammer impressively overcomes the tired,misogynistic Slasher elements of the movie,by turning the second half of the film into a GrindHouse Slasher!,with Hammer and Castle giving McCabe and Hatcher's search for the killer an unexpected comedic edge,whilst also making sure that the blood of Smith's victim's solely runs in the gutter,thanks to Hammer illegal filming on the dirty,grime-covered streets of Las Angeles,which lead to this phone call being one that you wont forget for a good while.

SPOILERS AHEAD ... A film requiring little sensibility, Don't Answer the Phone, joining Maniac (William Lustig, 1980), He Knows You're Alone (Armand Mastroianni, 1980) and Nightmare (Roman Scavolini, 1982) where no mystery surrounds the killers identity, is one strong dose of offensive medicine. It can get quite harrowing, especially in scenes where the killer pours hot wax over a pleading naked victim.

After a sudden name change to cash in on the Don't cycle (Don't Ride on Late Night Trains, Don't Look in the Basement, Don't Open the Window, Don't Go in the Woods, Don't Go Near the Park, Don't Go in the House…etc.) The Hollywood Strangler became Don't Answer the Phone. Basically, an overweight ex-Vietnam vet, with a fixation for leather and weightlifting goes nuts and strangles girls in the Hollywood area. He also has some father issues and frequently rants aloud about his abusive old man. Killing women he believes are in need of a moral lesson, playing a cat and mouse game with an agony-aunt-type DJ after tuning into her radio station and screaming at himself in the mirror, this is one psychopath you won't forget.

The lead performance by, Worth (Darkman, Dark Angel: The Accent…etc.) goes so OTT in his role as Kirk Smith it makes this film worth seeking out, although Don't Answer the Phone certainly is not for all sensibilities. The sleaze-o-meter here runs very high, making the viewers feel as sweaty as the hulking killer himself. It doesn't come as a surprise that such a film comes with its bad points. The direction is quite uneven, occasionally mixing bizarre humour with violence. The script can be considered quite inept, there's the expected macho-cop buddies' banter; it's one of these awful lines concluding the film. After Worth has done his Michael Myers indestructible killing machine impression, he is shot repeatedly, falls in a pool and has the tough cop stating over the tinted red pool - `Adios, creep!' Some can say, a bad end for a bad film. Check it out for yourself

When you watch an exploitation horror movie you sit down with a certain expectation of what you're going to get. To put it bluntly, sex and violence. It's what you watch films like this for. And yet, why did I come away from this film with such a nasty taste in my mouth ?

Well, to start with, this film was made by a misogynist. Okay, it's a film about a rapist-murderer so there's obviously going to be violence towards women but every female character in this film is either damaged:- drug addict, victim of abuse, potential suicide or completely ineffectual (more of that later).

There is also here a screenwriter who has a serious problem with psychiatrists. The police psychiatrist is shoved out of the way during a briefing ("we don't need any of this psycho mumbo jumbo") and the main protagonist is not only a psychiatrist but also - whisper it quietly - a woman!

There's a scene that highlights this misogyny and hatred of psychiatrists. In fact, it is otherwise irrelevant to the plot.

A woman is on the top of a tall building threatening to jump when the police arrive. The woman psychiatrist, Dr. Gail., is trying to talk her down. "How long's she been there ?" asks the cop. "Two hours" says the patrolman. "How long's Dr. Gail been talking to her ?" "15 minutes" "Is she doing any good ?" "No."

So the cop pushes Dr. Gail aside and basically says "Stop it. Behave yourself. Get down." At which the woman rushes into his arms. He then, of course, ends up in bed with Dr. Gail.

Even the killer, who has severe mental problems, ridicules the psychiatrist when she tries to reach him. Oh, he happens to be tying her to a chair at this point.

Which brings me to the policemen. There are two main cops, Lt. McCabe and Sgt. Hatcher, and they are complete idiots. I couldn't work out whether they were supposed to be taken seriously or not. I'm still not sure. They seem to ignore anyone who has any insight or actual information on the case, saying they're just doing their job. And when they 'do their job' - well...

They arrive at a suspect's house. Hatcher wants to break in but McCabe says they haven't got a warrant (why not ?) and if they break in anything they find would be inadmissible as evidence. Hatcher: "I wanna do it anyway" McCabe: "okay". Eh ?

So does this film have any redeeming qualities ? Well, maybe. Bizarrely it's The Killer or The Strangler. He's billed as both though his character has a name and more of a personality than anyone else in the film. Nicholas Worth in this part gives something close to a performance which sets him head and shoulders above anybody else in this film although his is a totally repellent character.

Having said all that, this film is not particularly graphic. Though that may just be the print I saw as there seemed to be some very abrupt edit points. However, I have absolutely no desire to see an uncut version.

Let me be clear. I'm a fan of the genre. I enjoy Friday 13th movies (even the duff ones), the Halloween series, and a lot of other stalk 'n' slash stuff so I'm no horror prude. But this is a film that hits you over the head with a sledgehammer to make it clear that women have no place in the world and are only good for sex. Avoid.

PS: Don't think this film sounds so bad it must be good. It's not. It's so bad it's bad.

Psychologist Dr. Lindsay Gale(Flo Gerrish) who operates a free clinic for troubled women, also working as a radio personality for those with emotional baggage and drug abuse, realizes that a caller, going by the name of Ramon(..speaking in a ridiculous accent)could be behind a series of strangulations towards women that is plaguing the police force who have exhausted themselves trying to catch him. That killer, Kirk Smith(Nicholas Worth)is actually a skilled photographer, but suffers from head aches and emotional trauma possibly stemming from his childhood, hinted at throughout as he pursues female victims in Hollywood. AS a lot of killers do, he's quite elusive, at first, but with each passing victim, Smith makes mistakes, leaving things(..like drug paraphernalia, and even his photographic equipment)behind at the crime scenes. The film follows this nasty psychopath, and his methods for finding and killing women & the detectives, McCabe & Hatcher(James Westmoreland & Ben Frank)trying to catch him. The film also establishes Gale's role as a care-giver to those who need assistance with problems/weaknesses plaguing their everyday lives, with her kindness setting her up as a potential victim for Smith.

I think the film's main asset is the tour-de-force performance of Worth as the mental case. He runs the gamut of emotions, crying at times, even quite pleasant when he approaches unfortunates who have no idea that they are to suffer the wrath of his mental trauma. Worth also has this bulky menacing figure which works well as an object of fear. Those poor women he chooses to strangle are frail in his monstrous hands. Smith often wears a stocking over his face which only adds to the ferocity of his attack scenes on women..we can see the rage even present through the stocking. I felt the more impacting scenes display a seemingly trustworthy Smith, soft-spoken and smiling cheerful, being invited by models/hookers hoping to make a splash on magazines..he uses his photographic strengths to take advantage of women, vulnerable to an attack they are not aware is escalating in Smith's mind. There's some tasteless humor put in the script, mostly for the detectives who find time to joke with each other..it's kind of a release valve for the horrors they must face everyday. The film probes the seedy side of Hollywood, Smith's hunting ground.

Alas, I watched the scissored version by Rhino which hacks away at the final product. There's at least 9 minutes I've not seen, so my rating is towards the cut version where even profanity is blanketed. You can clearly see how badly cut it is, blatantly obvious which annoys me to no end. There are even fade-outs right during a scene as if the censor police were making it quite clear as to their clipping methods. I realize a film like "Don't Answer the Phone!" will not appeal to everyone, or even most people. But, the audience that does watch this kind of film, wish to see it in it's entirety. I think it's rape, to be honest, when you strip away scenes meant for a film, just so you can grab a wider audience. A wide audience isn't gonna rent this film anyway. The film's low budget provides a raw feel that bodes well for the type of characters, plot, & setting featured. Michael Castle portrays a coroner who likes to sickeningly crack jokes about his cases, and Chris Wallace has an amusing scene as a legit traveling psychic, booked by McCabe because he knows way too much about the case!

Don't Answer the Phone! is set in Los Angeles & starts late one night as a nurse (Dale Kalberg) arrives home, there she finds a masked killer named Kirk Smith (Nicholas Worth) & she quickly becomes his fifth victim. Inept cops Lieutenant Chris McCabe (James Westmoreland) & his partner Sgt. Hatcher (Ben Frank) are on the case but going nowhere fast, when Kirk murders a prostitute on-air during psychiatrist Dr. Lindsay Gale's (Flo Gerrish) radio show she teams up with the two cops to track the killer down before he strikes again...

Originally shot under the title 'The Hollywood Strangler' only for the distribution company Crown International to change it to Don't Answer the Phone! for commercial reasons this was co-written, co-produced & directed by Robert Hammer & remains to this day his only theatrical directorial credit which isn't surprising given the quality of this film. The misogynistic script by Hammer & co-producer Michael D. Castle is as threadbare & basic as they come, even for a simplistic Halloween (1978) rip-off to cash in on the late 70's & early 80's slasher film craze Don't Answer the Phone! is seriously lacking in all departments. The slasher film is a limited sub genre as it is & films like Don't Answer the Phone! don't do it any favours, this one tries to be exploitative as it's set in the seedier side of Los Angeles like porn theatres & featuring supporting character's such as drug dealers, pimps & prostitutes while all the killers victims are busty young women. As if the film wasn't unlikable enough there are some truly pathetic attempts at humour & slapstick which just look totally out of place amongst the sleaze. The killer has little motivation, he never really interacts with the rest of the cast until the end, there's virtually zero gore as the director seems more intent of showing naked female breasts & Don't Answer the Phone! is unbearably slow going at 95 minutes in it's uncut state which is the one I'm basing my comments on.

Director Hammer films things in a dull sort of way & the film doesn't have any style although some of the location footage from the seedier parts of Los Angeles which were obviously obtained by just driving down regular streets with a camera pointing out of the passenger window are quite atmospheric. Other than though Don't Answer the Phone! is very short on style or imagination. This isn't scary at all, the killer never stalks his victims & the murder scenes are voyeuristic in tone rather than frightening. This has literally no gore apart from a few bullet wounds, the violence is also tame & disappointed me even in this so-called uncut version. The killer strangles a few women who happen to be in state of undress, that's as graphic as it gets. I suppose the mixing of nudity & violence gives this film a sleazy reputation it doesn't really deserve. Even the nudity when taken on it's own is rather restrained.

Technically the film is OK, it's competent although the music sucks & I always like that 70's & 80's horror film feel which Don't Answer the Phone! has, it's just a pity it doesn't do anything with it. Shot on location in Los Angeles. The acting sucks, no-one is going to win any awards here that's for sure.

Don't Answer the Phone! is maybe the worst of all the horror flicks that start with the word 'Don't' & considering we are talking about films like Don't Go in the Woods (1982), Don't Go in the House (1980), Don't Go Near the Park (1981) & Don't Go to Sleep (1982) that's no small feat. Exploitation fans might like to check it out but as far as everyone else is concerned this is definitely not recommended.

I don't know why this movie is called "Don't answer the phone" first of all. What is it about not answering the phone that should be the focus in this movie? Sure, there are a couple of people answering their phone while having a casual conversation with someone they knew but there was nothing disturbing about not answering the phone. The only connection I found about the phone was the numerous phone calls to a local radio doctor answering calls from a man named Ramone who then turns out to be the killer and a very weak killer he is. There is nothing so silly and so humorous as seeing this powder puff go around crying like a baby to his unseen daddy and vowing for revenge for some unknown reason that is never revealed in the story except maybe he and his mother may not have gotten along. And what is the purpose of putting a coin in a pair of panty hose and chocking the victim? Who came up with this idea? The movie would then fade away between annoying love scenes and the two cop stuges who couldn't find a clue if it bit them in the face. This movie was terrible! It could have been a little bit better is the killer would have just shut his fat mouth and had not showed his ugly face.

If any movie has earned being on the video nasty list - this one is on the Section 3 group of films, which couldn't be prosecuted for obscenity but were liable to be seized and confiscated under a less obscene charge - it's this movie.

This is the scummiest movie I've ever seen outside of films like Waterpower and Bloodsucking Freaks. Every single character is a horrible person, even the protagonists. It feels like you could take a Silkwood shower after this and it wouldn't be enough. You'd still feel dirty.

Former paratrooper and powerlifter - who would later become a born-again Christian - Nicholas Worth plays Kirk Smith, who is also a veteran and bodybuilder. He has talent - well, when it comes to the lighting and composition of his pornographic photos, which have the ability to offend everyone, even scumbags like, well, everyone else in this movie. When he's not grunting and lifting weights, he's calling the talk show of Dr. Lindsay Gale (Flo Lawrence, who is also in Schizoid, Over the Top and The Lords of Salem). When he gets on the air, he speaks in fake accents and complains that he has migraines and blackouts.

All of that would be fine if he wasn't stalking and killing women right and left, not unlike the Hillside Stranglers of real life. That makes sense, as this movie was shot under the working title of The Hollywood Strangler. None of this was shot with permits, either.

It gets worse. He not only kills women, he has, well, intimate relations with their dead bodies before conducting religious ceremonies, trying to talk with his dead father and crying.

Two detectives - Hatcher (Ben Frank, Death Wish 2) and McCabe (James Westmoreland, who was in Stacey and was married to Kim Darby) - are on the case, but it feels like they're just as horrible as anyone else in this movie, overworked and on the edge.

There's also a porn dealer named Sam Gluckman, played by Chuck Mitchell, who would one day by Porky himself from Porky's, a role that is packed with more class than this movie. The sheer amount of salaciousness and scum in his scenes nearly fills the scene with bile.

Dr. Gale and McCabe quickly go from love to hate. Neither actor liked one another much, so Lawrence - who played Gale - ate a bunch of onions and Westmoreland - who was McCabe - didn't shave on the day that their tender and romantic scene was shot.

Of course, it ends with Smith attacking Dr. Gale and McCabe saving her, shooting the strangler many, many times before he falls into a swimming pool, upon which the hero - such as this movie is - says, "Adios, creep!"

Director Robert Hammer is a one and done wonder. Sure, he made documentaries on Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young and The Steve Miller Band, but that's it. Otherwise, he became a CFO for several companies.

It was written by Michael Castle, who acted in films like Galaxina and Gas! -Or- It Became Necessary to Destroy the World in Order to Save It. It's the only movie he ever wrote, working from the novel Nightline by Michael Curtis.

Keep an eye out for April 1978 Playboy Playmate of the Month Pamela Jean Bryant as Sue Ellen. She's also in all manner of late 70's and early 80's films that probably only I care about like H.O.T.S. and Lunch Wagon. Dale Kalberg, who was in scumtastic flicks like Mistress of the Apes and SexWorld, is another victim. And Susanne Severeid, who was a former model, plays yet another prostitute who ends up in Kirk Smith's list of crimes. Interestingly enough, her husband was a WWII Dutch resistance fighter who was hired by the Simon Weisenthal Center to hunt Dr. Josef Mengele in real life.

Gail Jensen is another victim in this movie. She also performed the song "Sweater Girl" from the movie of the same name, as well as two songs on the Maniac Cop soundtrack. It gets crazier - she wrote "The Unknown Stuntman," the theme from Lee Majors' TV series The Fall Guy, along with being married to David Carradine, who she starred alongside in Future Zone.

Despite my warnings of the sleaze quotient of this movie, you should know that I loved early single moment of it. I'm ashamed, but isn't that part of the fun of lurid movies like this? If you're of a similar mind - let's say you're a maniac - you will probably feel the same way.

1) Obtain a copy of this movie in a format in which you can watch it. (IE if you own a DVD player, but a DVD copy) 2) COme to IMDb.com and COme to this Page for "DONT ANSWER THE PHONE!" 3) While the movie is playing, read the comments and reviews made by people who have watched this film.

Seriously, it is one of the Funniest things in the world(Especially with shots of whiskey). While going through reviews of people who love this film to those who hate and detest everything about it, this movie tends to bring out the comedian in everyone.

Trust me, if you do this, you'll never be more entertained.

MY REVIEW: It is a movie so bad it's good and one to be seen by those who can appreciate a trashy film that is horrific and bad. There are few of us, but we do exist. Its over the top disturbing, not terrorfying disturbing.

Okay, I'm going to assume that since there were so many Halloween rip-offs in the few years following 1978 due that slasher film's success, just as there were a lot of "Don't" movies, because, um, I guess people were scared to listen to…advice?

1980's Don't Answer the Phone! certainly had tons of phone calls. In practically every scene, someone was answering a call – and this was the pre-cell explosion, but never once was there a reason to NOT answer the phone. Sure, "The Killer" (as hilariously labeled in the opening credits, but later referred to as "The Strangler") calls one of his targets a few times, but then, she ran a call-in psychology radio program. I guess there was one time he was planning on killing, er, strangling, a woman and he had her telephone the on-air doctor, but that was her job: to answer the phone.

Other than the odd and no-reason for film's title, The Strangler kinda wanders aimlessly around town looking for his next female victim – even though he claimed to had done "a lot of research (on his victims.)" All the while, two cops run around, also randomly, to catch this bad man, but in the process they mouth off the most hideously bad and intentional jokes. I'm guessing in 1980, it was okay to make light of and joke about a man who rapes and kills women – sometimes the other way around.

Now, if I didn't have such a odd thing for the mostly shirtless "the Killer/Stranger" actor, Nicholas Worth and the surprisingly good acting and depth from the obvious final victim, Flo Lawrence's Dr. Gale, this movie would be a solid 1/5 Stars.

Okay, beyond my attraction, this horrible throwaway movie shan't be seen by anyone for it has no real redeeming qualities. That is, if anyone were to even find a copy like I stumbled upon.

* * * Final thoughts: Do answer the phone, just not by the agent responsible for putting you in such crap.

Beefy, plug-ugly character actor Nicholas ("Swamp Thing," "Darkman") Worth hits marvelously messed-up maniacal mondo disgusto wacko paydirt with his juicy starring role as Kirk Smith, an impotent, psychotic, misogynistic, schizophrenic and utterly unhinged 'Nam vet rapist/strangler photographer who viciously murders assorted luckless lovely young ladies in this terrifically tawdry'n'trashy low-budget Los Angeles-set exploitation psycho horror howler. Crying, bellowing, hefting heavy weights in grunting'n'grueling slow motion, insanely ranting over the phone to female talk radio shrink Dr. Gale (the very pretty and appealing Flo Garrish) in a hysterically phony'n'fulsome Mexican accent, and savagely throttling hot babes with a coin-filled stocking in a warped, desperate attempt at appeasing his deceased abusive father (Worth's single most sublimely screwy moment occurs when he cuts loose in a massive let it all hang out rant and roars in a monstrous scream, "Are you proud of me now?! Do I measure up?!"), Nic's gloriously gonzo eye-rolling hambone portrayal is an absolute hoot and a half that's in equal degrees hellishly riveting and rather uncomfortably riotous. James Westmoreland gives a similarly strong performance as the ramrod homicide detective who's determined to nail Kirk, a hard-nosed sort with a brutish and fiercely amoral "you gotta bend the law in order to enforce it" attitude that makes Dirty Harry seem like a soft'n'sappy bleeding heart liberal (and nicely blurs the fine line between good and evil as well). Better still, writer/director/producer Robert Hammer goes whole hog on the seedy atmosphere, really pours on the gratuitous nudity, graphic violence and full-bore profanity, and doesn't show a shred of either subtlety or restraint, thereby making this sensationally slimy, gritty and downright nihilistic grindhouse nugget a total tacky treat for hardcore sleaze cinema buffs.