- Sergeant Frank Lackley: He got your gun... your badge... and your teeth? You are a disgrace to the police force.
- Krishna Ravindra: My name's Ravindra. What's yours?
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Trouble.
- [Grabs Ravindra's hand and breaks his finger]
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: The first thing they shoulda told you at your hooker classes is that you shouldn't ask the client so many fucking personal questions.
- Susie Waggoner: I had to give him the benefit of the doubt. He always ate everything I ever gave him and he never hit me.
- Susie Waggoner: ...And you save your money... and buy a nice little house, with a white picket fence, and live happily ever after.
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Tell you what. Let's go straight to the "happily ever after" part, OK?
- Susie Waggoner: So... are you gonna tell me about it?
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Yeah, I'm gonna tell you about it. This *straight* life we've been living gave me a false sense of security. For a second I thought I was some kind of solid citizen or something.
- Susie Waggoner: All I wanna know is what happened to you.
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Some guy in a blue Toyota pickup ran me over.
- Susie Waggoner: I thought it must've been something like that...
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: I wrote two, heh.
- Susie Waggoner: Well, maybe I get extra credit.
- [Notices pork chops in kitchen sink]
- Susie Waggoner: Hey! Where did you get these?
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Dumb question. Are you a nosy rosy?
- [Doorbell rings]
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: What the hell was that man?
- Susie Waggoner: The doorbell. Talking about dumb questions.
- Edna Damrosch: I nursed my husband for three years before he died. But you're not gonna die.
- [Hands Junior a glass of gin]
- Edna Damrosch: Here, drink this.
- Susie Waggoner: It's gin, Junior.
- Edna Damrosch: Drink it! Now you move and you're a blind man.
- [Begins sewing up Junior's eyebrow]
- Edna Damrosch: Scissors!
- Susie Waggoner: [Feeling sick] You're doing real good, Junior. I think I'm gonna lie down a little bit.
- Edna Damrosch: [after she finishes off] There you go!
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Your husband must've been glad to die...
- Susie Waggoner: Thanks...
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Yeah you got a real nice touch there lady.
- Sergeant Hoke Moseley: Your turn to notify the next of kin?
- Sergeant Bill Henderson: No way. I did the fat lady that sat on the kid. That's good for two.
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: [making up haikus as he robs a neighbor appartment] Thinking he is alone... breaking, entering... the dark and lonely place-places...
- [finds gun under mattress]
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: ... finding a... *big gun*...
- [opens fridge and steals some pork chops]
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: ... smelling like a rose.
- Toy Store Cashier: [Frederick J. Frenger Jr. points a gun at the Toy Store Cashier]
- [Into PA System]
- Toy Store Cashier: Price Check, Uzi squirt gun.
- Toy Store Cashier: [Frederick shows the butt of the clip to the cashier, with the price tag]
- [Into PA System]
- Toy Store Cashier: Disregard
- Frederick J. Frenger Jr.: Do you know any married people today? They're a team. They pull together and they get rich. They got it all.