Next Friday (2000)

Ice Cube: Craig Jones

Photos 

Quotes 

• Day-Day : Roach, if Pinky catches you doing that X-Games shit on the counter, we both gon' be fired!

  African : [walking in store]  Motherfuckers. You motherfuckers! What the fuck is this? You motherfuckers!

  Day-Day : Can I help you, sir?

  African : Yes, what is this? Huh? This is whack! I can't get jiggy with this shit! Where's your damn manager, that pink motherfucker?

  Day-Day : The manager's not here. I'm running the store right now.

  African : You look like the playa-hater who sold me this shit. Give me back my damn money right now, and I don't have no damn receipt.

  Day-Day : Do you have the cover, sir?

  African : I don't have no damn cover! Kiss my ass, so what?

  Day-Day : Can I see it sir?

  [looks at CD] 

  Day-Day : What, were you chewing on this shit before you got here?

  African : Bullshit, motherfucker! Do you know who you are fucking with?

  Day-Day : Bishop Desmond Tutu?

  African : Try again, motherfucker!

  Day-Day : Winnie Mandela's lil'...

  African : Try *again*, motherfucker!

  Day-Day : Just an ugly ass black dude.

  African : I'll go *postal* in this motherfucker!

  Day-Day : Man, you better take your hostile black ass outta here!

  African : [knocks down CD stand as Craig walks in]  Ol' biatch...

  [Craig shoves him into CD rack] 

  African : Oh, shit! Please, don't hurt me! Please! This's John Blaze; I can get jiggy with this!

  Craig : Get your ass up outta here!

  African : I'm just a bitch-ass nigga!

• Pinky : [points a gun to Craig's head]  Don't move! Or I'll blow your goddamn head smooth off. Now back up. Slowly! Don't say a word.

  Craig Jones : But I was jus...

  Pinky : [cuts Craig off]  I said don't say a word!

  Pinky : [giggles]  Little muthafucka gonna try and rob me. Well I'ma show you how we do it here in Pinky's *noogah*.

  Craig Jones : I wasn't trying to...

  Pinky : [cuts Craig off]  Shut up! Before I bust a cap in yo' ass. Now what'chu been done wit' Day-Day and Roach?

  Craig Jones : Day-Day is my peep...

  Pinky : [cuts Craig off]  Shut up!

  Pinky : Now who sent you, nigga?

  Craig Jones : Nobody sen...

  Pinky : [cuts Craig off]  Shut the fu... Did I say... Ohhh, nigga! I'll... oh, shit! Say something! Say something else, nigga! I'ma tie yo' monkey ass up.

• Uncle Elroy : [Suga falls on Craig's lap, face down]  Negro, what the hell you doing with my woman?

  Craig : I don't know. I must have... shit.

  Uncle Elroy : Suga? What the hell you doing with my nephew?

  Suga : I'm sorry, baby. I thought it was you.

  Uncle Elroy : Come on, baby. I'm faded, feeling X-rated. It's Mr. Nasty Time.

  Suga : Mr. Nasty Time!

  Uncle Elroy : Mr. Nasty Time. But take it easy on my back.

  [to Craig] 

  Uncle Elroy : Make yourself at home, nephew.

• Day-Day : How'd you get out here?

  Craig Jones : I walked.

  Day-Day : You walked?

  Craig Jones : Yeah.

  Day-Day : You can't be walkin' around this white neighborhood, man. You look suspect.

• Craig Jones : Look, we cousins and everything, but don't be hooking me up with the *little* sister that's bigger than the *big* sister!

• Day-Day : I got the BGs

  Craig Jones : What's the BGs?

  Day-Day : The bubble guts, I'm nervous and I'm bout to shit on my self

• Mr. Jones : Now Craig, it's gonna be different living out here. Don't let your Uncle or your cousin get you in any shit. Now you hear me?

  Craig Jones : Pops I'm grown now, can't nobody get me in trouble no more.

  Mr. Jones : Well I'm glad you said that son, but since you grown, don't bring your black ass back home.

• Uncle Elroy : I bet you smoke a lil' weed, don't ya?

  Craig Jones : Why do say that?

  Uncle Elroy : [looks at him]  Cause your lip's turnin' black!

• Craig Jones : [in Craig's halluncination showing Karla giving him a lap dance]  You heard of El Nino?

  Karla Joker : [Speaking Seductively]  Yeah...

  Craig Jones : This is El Negro. Come on down here and let me tap that ass.

• Deebo : Here come that dog truck. Shut your mouth! We about to fade to black.

  Craig Jones : [as Craig notices Deebo standing in front of the truck]  Daddy, Stop!

  [Mr. Jones Screams] 

  Deebo : Get your punk-ass out of the car Craig, this is the re-match!

  Deebo : Get out of the car!

  Craig Jones : Punch It!

  Tyrone : [as Mr. Jones drives away]  Deebo! Help!

  Craig Jones : Fake-Ass Suge Knight!

  Deebo : [yelling out before kicking his brother in the stomach]  You know I gonna find you and when I do, I'm gonna put my foot up in your ass!

  [Looking down at his brother] 

  Deebo : Man get up!

  Tyrone : Damn! Man, I'm tired. I'm goin to mommy's house.

  Deebo : [pulling him by the chain on his leg]  Come on!

  Tyrone : [Yelling at Deebo]  No!, No!

  Mr. Jones : [on the way to Rancho Cucamonga]  Did you see That! Those two niggas were acting like pit bull dogs!

• Craig Jones : What's that smell?

  Mr. Jones : Must be your upper lip, son, I don't smell nothing.

  Craig Jones : Ew, I do! It smell like you didn't fall in no mud!

  Mr. Jones : [while Spraying air freshener]  Just use some of this spray, son.

  Craig Jones : Aw, Too much!

  [Trying to get the window open] 

  Craig Jones : What's worng with this window?

  Mr. Jones : It's broken, remind me to get it fixed

  Craig Jones : [Struggling to get the window open]  Damn!

• [discussion about Day-Day's ex] 

  Craig Jones : Psycho, huh? She must be worst than Left Eye from TLC or somethin'.

  Day-Day : Yeah, well, this fat bitch ain't burnin'!

• Craig Jones : I just hate to see a fine girl like you in a situation like this.

  Karla : [smirks]  Thanks for noticing. It used to be peaceful around here, before they got out. They took over the house, and caused my mother's nervous breakdown.

  Craig Jones : Dang, why she didn't just kick 'em out.

  Karla : We tried. We saved up to get away from them, but they just followed us.

  Craig Jones : Damn, I hate to hear that.

• Mailman : [knocks on door]  .

  Mailman : Delivery, got a delivery.

  [rings doorbell twice] 

  Craig Jones : Who is it?

  Mailman : Got a delivery. Come on smart blood. Come on I got a delivery, its kind of hot out here buddy.

  [Craig opens the door] 

  Mailman : Come on sparky.

  Craig Jones : What's up!

  Mailman : Nice house. I didn't expect you to answer it, but this is a fine place here. What are you, one of those uh, entertainer guys, huh. What do you play sports? What team do you play for?

  Craig Jones : I play for the Cucamonga Cracker Killers. You want tickets...

  Mailman : [waves his hand]  Hey don't want any trouble with you. You don't have to send your posse out here to do a 187 in my ass. Just uh, got a little mail for you to sign.

  [puts both hands up] 

  Mailman : Partner!

  Craig Jones : What's this?

  Mailman : Uh, that's what they call a delinquent property tax notice. I hope the crack killers pay well. Otherwise it's back to the ghetto you go. Uh, take it easy.

  [starts singing a tune and walks away] 

• Craig Jones : Look, I'm your cousin an' ev'rything, but don't be hookin' me up with the little sister that's bigger than the big sister!