Death to Smoochy (2002)

Danny DeVito: Burke Bennett

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sheldon : Burke, I can't accept this.

  Burke : No?

  Sheldon : I never owned a gun. I don't believe in them.

  Burke : Really?

  Sheldon : When I was a kid and my brothers and I played Cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker.

• Burke : It's all about the dough, Shel. Once you get the money, you get the power. Once you get the power, you can have Smoochy walk out there with a dildo strapped to his head if you want.

  Sheldon : [long pause]  I don't think I've thought of that idea specifically, but I? I do see where you're going with this.

• Burke : This is the high life, Sheldon. You gotta get used to this. Pretty soon you're gonna be pissin' on hundred dollar bills just to see the look on Franklin's face!

  Sheldon : I don't think I could ever do that. I have much too much respect for what that man accomplished.

• Burke : Sheldon, I know you got a fetish for ethics.

• Burke : [re-negotiating Sheldon's contract]  Allow me to untangle this web of shit. I don't care if his last job was jugging apples for a hut full of pygmies on the outskirts of the congo! This man fits the bill, and you need him! And that's why the rhino's going to get exactly what he deserves.

• Burke : If you rat on the Parade of Hope, you'll be lucky to find your toenails. These guys are the roughest of all the charities.