(2000 Video)

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5/10
Curiously retro.
rmax30482330 January 2005
This is pornography pure and simple, no doubt about it. And formulaic pornography too. The formula is this. There are some dozen or so episodes, each unrelated to the others except thematically. What happens in each episode is that we see the bare genitals of some actor (we don't see his face or hear him, thank heavens for small favors). His penis is already erect. And then some naked babe comes in and immediately starts doing full blast what the title of the film suggests, sometimes making comments on the progress of the act, until nature takes its inevitable course.

Man, it's like almost all the other skin flicks I've sampled over the years. Initially, the reaction is interest, but it fades into boredom in a few minutes due to a dire lack of imagination on the part of the movie makers and because of the sheer repetitiousness of it all.

And it's retro too, because the market has been flooded with skin flicks since the early 1970s and nothing has been excluded. Yet, here we have the fulfillment of fantasies that are at best adolescent.

This kind of flick will be objected to by both the conservatives and liberals. I can't argue with the conservatives because they simply classify it as "immoral" and morality involves axioms based not on logic but ethics. You either think it's immoral or you don't care. (I don't think many people would argue that it's actually MORAL to produce skin flicks.) From the left we have objections by liberals, especially feminists like Andrea Dworkin, that it encourages rape and is degrading to women. At least you can argue with this position. I don't know how it encourages rape to see, in this instance, some young woman doing to a man what she probably does in private anyway. Of course she gets paid for doing it here, but so does the guy. Does it degrade him too? Anyhow it seems a little hypocritical to condemn garbage like this and yet allow teenagers to watch slasher movies in which an innocent victim (usually a girl) gets her head sawed off by a hedge trimmer. If kids are going to imitate what they see on the screen, what would we rather have them imitate -- murdering people or making love to them?

Sometimes (this is so bad) the ad libs by the actresses are unintentionally funny. "Oh, baby," says one (or something like that), "how would you like to see this thing buried in my cleavage?" But she has been surgically (or magically) transformed and her breasts are the size of bowling balls and her cleavage is the Great African Rift and her nipples are quahogs. This transcends ordinary sexuality. It reaches for the stars.

But I have to admit there was one episode that I found really kind of interesting from start to finish. It's the only one that involves two young women instead of one. They go through more or less the same motions as the others but with far more joi de vivre. One of the girls is especially enticing. She makes a brief comment to the other in a language I couldn't identify, probably Slavic, and I would guess Russian. She's petite dark-haired and acts like a naughty eleven-year-old playing doctor or something. She smiles gleefully, is inexpert in her task, giggles at the camera, and is thoroughly captivating. I swear, and I mean it literally, all the sex business aside, I would love to have dinner with her in the Russian Tea Room if it's still there. She looks like an awful lot of fun.
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