I can't believe I sat through this, nothing what so ever to recommend. You would be better off watching an Ed Wood marathon of movies, which would be far better made. The visuals and effects are terrible. The plot, from what I can remember (I have tried to forget, but details still haunt me) is simple and has something to do with the opening of a mummy theme park You know, like Jurassic park but with mummies. it's beyond a bad movie, as bad movies can be fun, even a laugh. No laughs to be had here. Thankfully I can't remember an awful lot so I can at least spare you any more details; in fact even reading a review of this movie is time wasted, go watch paint dry it's more exciting. I mean it, if you think this review is bad then go watch Mummy Theme Park!
6 Reviews
Don't waste your time!
Russell6218 November 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Why this movie was ever made, let alone placed in the horror section of my local DVD rental shop comes from an area of logical thought that is totally beyond me. Everything about it is a dismal flop. The acting is mostly dire, no surprise that many of the cast have never appeared in any subsequent movies (The Curse of the Mummy Themepark perhaps?) The costumes are idiotic, not even remotely accurate, the false beards look like something they used to clean out the prop room after plundering it for every crappy cliché in the book. The opening scene shows some cowardly locals, and a Brit explorer looking vaguely like something out of the 1924 Tutankamun expedition. There is effectively no plot, no character development, and no reason to waste your time renting this atrocity. The editors warn not to add spoilers. Me write any spoilers? Don't worry, there is nothing to spoil, if anyone reading this is unwise enough to bother watching this uber-turkey, that is their funeral! Don't forget the mummy wrappings!
Hey, this should have been buried with E.T. The videogame
dabbenstein21 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Hello, I originally thought this was a documentary about a roller coaster at universal theme park but nope.... I stumbled onto the worst film of the 2000s yeah ummm don't watch this literally some guy dies by a mummy touching another man genitals yeah weird hey another things surprises aren't surprises when you already show the concept. Another 2000s trope terrible CGI god wish I have never seen this film oh the dumb blonde showing of several woman's breasts not cool and I quote a terrible scene mummy stares at the dumb blonde's breasts then back to mummy then even worse to her co-worker who also stares at her breasts and said I think it's in love with your breasts and then she lowers her top I know the movie is R-Rated but this movie god no forced slavery also the main train they used to travel was never fueled and the track system is wicked flimsy.
On a Final Note Do not watch this movie ever trust me you'll just be bored and waiting for it to be done.
Just in case this is my second film review on the 89 Film Extravaganza
On a Final Note Do not watch this movie ever trust me you'll just be bored and waiting for it to be done.
Just in case this is my second film review on the 89 Film Extravaganza
Something charming about the cheapness
bensan911 June 2019
I don't really understand why people give this one a 1 star rating. It is certainly a low, low budget cheesy movie, but that can be enjoyed if you are expecting it.
The mummy theme park idea is certainly entertaining enough. The main character is a camera man and the actress who plays his assistant is pretty. There are some mummy monsters but they are all just fake and not at all scary.
The camerawork has a 3D feel to it using the sets and the screens to give a pretty interesting look to the whole film. It is certainly a cheap look, but it kind of draws you in. The colorful (very, very fake) sets are amusing - sometimes the walls look like cardboard stages. I really like movies that create their own sets and worlds. This one does it to the extreme though very cheaply.
The fake looking costumes and mummies are so bad that they become fun as well. Overall not a bad way to spend your time if you are looking for something different and creative for eye candy.
On the negative side, there is no suspense or sense overall. All of the acting is over the top and terrible as well, but again that can be part of the charm and entertainment.
The mummy theme park idea is certainly entertaining enough. The main character is a camera man and the actress who plays his assistant is pretty. There are some mummy monsters but they are all just fake and not at all scary.
The camerawork has a 3D feel to it using the sets and the screens to give a pretty interesting look to the whole film. It is certainly a cheap look, but it kind of draws you in. The colorful (very, very fake) sets are amusing - sometimes the walls look like cardboard stages. I really like movies that create their own sets and worlds. This one does it to the extreme though very cheaply.
The fake looking costumes and mummies are so bad that they become fun as well. Overall not a bad way to spend your time if you are looking for something different and creative for eye candy.
On the negative side, there is no suspense or sense overall. All of the acting is over the top and terrible as well, but again that can be part of the charm and entertainment.
Magical junk
BandSAboutMovies24 October 2021
Warning: Spoilers
I used to worry that I would run out of berserk Italian movies, especially when the 1990s give way to the 2000s but that shows what I know, because The Mummy Theme Park - the jobs in this movie would be theme park owner, photographer and model in case you wonder - is one of the most baffling, weird, wonderful and just plain strange movies that I've seen.
Alvaro Passeri has only directed five movies*, including Plankton, Flight to Hell, The Golden Grain and Psychovision. His animation skills - he worked on Cinema Paradiso, The Shark Hunter, The Wild Beasts, Atlantis Interceptors and more - really come in handy here because this is a movie that sees its low budget and says, "We can do more."
An earthquake reveals the underground City of the Dead in Egypt and Sheik El Sahid get the somewhat bright and probably more deranged idea to take all of the mummies and fit them with animatronics and turn them into a Jurassic Park in the sands. He wants it to be a big deal, so he calls over photographer Daniel Flynn (Adam O'Neil) and his co-worker Julie (Holly Laningham) to take photos of the place, which as far as I can tell is one room with mirrors and miniatures and all manner of in-camera and in-post special effects working as hard as they can and then some to make this movie look bigger than it is while also looking cheap while also appearing to be one of the most charming movies I've ever seen. It's neon, it's glitter, it's robot mummies, it's insane.
And yet, this isn't a movie made goofy on purpose. It's deliriously sure of itself and yet unaware of what it is at the same time and that's the combination that I love more than any other when it comes to weird movies.
Can the flash of a camera bring mummies back to life? Are women's breasts the only thing that can stop them? Will heads get torn off? Will someone puke up everything inside them? Can a chase scene go on forever? Will there be long scenes of fashion that pad the running time? Will there be a model train that goes through a sphinx? Is there also an evil sorceress? Will the sheik's harem fight against one another and will one of them also be a hologram? Will there be a souvenir shop that has pharaoh heads that spit out beer?
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and yes.
I mean, this is the kind of movie where a dude gets his head sliced in half and the results look like those cutaway pages in encyclopedias we all used to obsess over. And for that reason and so many others, this is perfect. Man, I'm still processing this movie. I keep reading reviews laughing about how cheap this movie looks and we should be so lucky to have this in our lives.
*Under that name, that is. There's also the rumor that he's Massimiliano Cerchi, the name under which he's directed seventeen movies including The Penthouse that came out this year. Unless there are two directors and special effects guys who have the same name and I've been surprised before and if you do the math, Cerchi was making those movies when he was eight. IMDB used to have them as the same person and now they're separated, so perhaps...who can say!?!
Alvaro Passeri has only directed five movies*, including Plankton, Flight to Hell, The Golden Grain and Psychovision. His animation skills - he worked on Cinema Paradiso, The Shark Hunter, The Wild Beasts, Atlantis Interceptors and more - really come in handy here because this is a movie that sees its low budget and says, "We can do more."
An earthquake reveals the underground City of the Dead in Egypt and Sheik El Sahid get the somewhat bright and probably more deranged idea to take all of the mummies and fit them with animatronics and turn them into a Jurassic Park in the sands. He wants it to be a big deal, so he calls over photographer Daniel Flynn (Adam O'Neil) and his co-worker Julie (Holly Laningham) to take photos of the place, which as far as I can tell is one room with mirrors and miniatures and all manner of in-camera and in-post special effects working as hard as they can and then some to make this movie look bigger than it is while also looking cheap while also appearing to be one of the most charming movies I've ever seen. It's neon, it's glitter, it's robot mummies, it's insane.
And yet, this isn't a movie made goofy on purpose. It's deliriously sure of itself and yet unaware of what it is at the same time and that's the combination that I love more than any other when it comes to weird movies.
Can the flash of a camera bring mummies back to life? Are women's breasts the only thing that can stop them? Will heads get torn off? Will someone puke up everything inside them? Can a chase scene go on forever? Will there be long scenes of fashion that pad the running time? Will there be a model train that goes through a sphinx? Is there also an evil sorceress? Will the sheik's harem fight against one another and will one of them also be a hologram? Will there be a souvenir shop that has pharaoh heads that spit out beer?
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and yes.
I mean, this is the kind of movie where a dude gets his head sliced in half and the results look like those cutaway pages in encyclopedias we all used to obsess over. And for that reason and so many others, this is perfect. Man, I'm still processing this movie. I keep reading reviews laughing about how cheap this movie looks and we should be so lucky to have this in our lives.
*Under that name, that is. There's also the rumor that he's Massimiliano Cerchi, the name under which he's directed seventeen movies including The Penthouse that came out this year. Unless there are two directors and special effects guys who have the same name and I've been surprised before and if you do the math, Cerchi was making those movies when he was eight. IMDB used to have them as the same person and now they're separated, so perhaps...who can say!?!
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