All in the Family (TV Series)

Cousin Liz (1977)

Carroll O'Connor: Archie Bunker

Photos 

Quotes 

• [at the wake; after finding out that Veronica and Liz were lovers] 

  Archie Bunker : Turn around and march yourself in there and you pick up your silver; let's go home to New York!

  Edith Bunker : Oh, no, I ain't gonna do that, Archie!

  Archie Bunker : You mean you're gonna disobey your husband?

  Edith Bunker : [thinks about it]  Yeah! Case closed!

• Edith Bunker : [about Cousin Liz's death]  It's so sad.

  Archie Bunker : I'll give you that. Liz was a beautiful girl, and the nicest relation in your family. I always said she was the one good egg in a barrel of rotten apples.

• Archie Bunker : [about Cousin Liz's Funeral]  I hope it ain't one of those open-casket affairs, you know. I hate looking at someone that ain't looking back at me.

• Archie Bunker : You're the next of kin. When you get it, you turn it over for $10.

  Edith Bunker : Oh, it's worth more than that.

  Archie Bunker : Okay, $12.50.

  Edith Bunker : No, that must be at least $2000

  Archie Bunker : $2000? Get outta here.

  Edith Bunker : That's real antique sterling silver. That's worth a fortune these days, but I ain't gonna sell it. It's gonna stay right in the family where it belongs.

  Archie Bunker : There's a trip to California on that tray.

• Archie Bunker : [Pulls a yarmulke out of his jacket pocket]  Aw geez! Look at this. Remember where I wore that?

  Edith Bunker : Oh yeah, Stretch Cunningham's funeral. That's your beanie.

  Archie Bunker : This ain't a beanie. You know what the Jews call this? A Yamaha, Edith.

• Edith Bunker : [Archie suggests the possibility of Edith collecting an inheritance from her late Cousin Liz]  She didn't have much money, Archie

  Archie Bunker : What do you mean? What expense could she have? All them years sharing that apartment with the other old maid school teacher, Veronica Whosis?

  Edith Bunker : Well, that's why they had to share it, cause they was teachers. Teachers don't make much money. Look at Mike.

  Archie Bunker : Don't make me thinka him and the corpse in the one day!

• Edith Bunker : [looking at the motel room]  It's nice.

  Archie Bunker : It stinks.

• Archie Bunker : I hate motels. What was that creepy desk clerk whispering into your ear there?

  Edith Bunker : He wanted to know if we was gonna use the room for more than an hour.

  Archie Bunker : Aw, geez!

  Edith Bunker : I wonder why he asked me that.

  Archie Bunker : Because whenever we check into a motel you stand around looking guilty.

• Archie Bunker : [referring to Stretch Cunningham]  You want me to fix her up with poor Stretch in Heaven. She ain't even gonna go to Heaven!

  Edith Bunker : Archie, Veronica and Cousin Liz loved each other...

  Archie Bunker : Oh, geez!

  Edith Bunker : ...like you and me.

  Archie Bunker : Don't say that! Like you and me? Oh Lord help me; you are so knave about these things. I mean don't you understand that there's a hell of a difference between love and...

  [mouths the word 'sex'] 

  Archie Bunker : ... between people who have the same and different 'you know'.

  Edith Bunker : Oh, Archie. That part don't have nothing to do with it.

  Archie Bunker : The part has EVERYTHING to do with it! That part!

• Archie Bunker : Liz was lez?