The Andy Griffith Show (TV Series)

The Farmer Takes a Wife (1962)

Andy Griffith: Andy Taylor

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jeff Pruitt : No, for marryin', a fella wants a... a female type, you know? Kinda soft and squishy-like. I figure the right place to find one of 'em's right here in town.

  Andy Taylor : Oh. Well, they ought to be a few answerin' that description around here.

  Jeff Pruitt : Sure! Only need *one*! I figure I'll stick around town a couple days and look over the available stock and pick one and take her back to the farm.

• Andy Taylor : You can't pick out a wife in just two days!

  Jeff Pruitt : Why not?

  Andy Taylor : Well, how you know you goin' find one who wants to marry you that quick?

  Jeff Pruitt : Well, I'm good-lookin', ain't I?

  Andy Taylor : Well, yeah.

  Jeff Pruitt : I'm strong enough to protect a woman, ain't I?

  Andy Taylor : Well, sure.

  Jeff Pruitt : Got one of the best farms in the county, ain't I?

  Andy Taylor : Well, yeah.

  Jeff Pruitt : Well, then, shouldn't take more'n two days!

• Opie Taylor : [about Jeff Pruitt]  Guess what I saw him doin'?

  Andy Taylor : What?

  Opie Taylor : Standin' on the corner, pickin' up girls.

  Andy Taylor : What do you know about pickin' up girls?

  Opie Taylor : Gosh, Pa! What's there to know? Whenever a girl walks by, he just picks her up and then sets her down and says, "'Scuse me, ma'am. Just checkin' your weight."

• Andy Taylor : He's like a fella in a fancy restaurant. He wants to order somethin' but there's too much on the menu.

• Barney Fife : I'm disappointed in you, Andy! I am *really* disappoint... I have... I can't remember when I have been *this* disappointed in you!

  Andy Taylor : What are you disappointed in me for?

  Barney Fife : Well, why didn't you stop me?

  Andy Taylor : I couldn't stop ya!

  Barney Fife : That's right! That's right! Pass the buck!

  Andy Taylor : Barney, I'm not passin' the buck. I'm just remindin' you of the facts and the facts are: Jeff come to town, said he's lookin' for a bride, you said you'd help him and the way you helped, you took him over to Thelma Lou's and that's how it all happened!

  Barney Fife : Oh, why hash over ancient history?