- The Master: Very well, I will arrange for you to leave this life, dispense with it, shuffle off this mortal coil. If you were dead, Mr. Steed... if you were dead, the world would not pursue you any further. The heat would be off, eh? I will arrange your death for you.
- John Steed: I could arrange that too, and cheaper.
- Bagpipes Happychap: We like to make death fun! I can squeeze you between an admiral on your port, a midshipman on your starboard and a submarine commander on astern.
- Bagpipes Happychap: Really Mr. Steed, this morbid curiosity is verging on an obsession. If it's digging you're interested in, why don't you take up gardening? I mean roses for instance, plant now and by the summer you should have a fine crop of...
- Bagpipes Happychap: This is awful! Simply awful! There's no body left!"
- John Steed: The great grave robbery.
- Bagpipes Happychap: If you put money into a bank, a reputable bank, you don't keep drawing it out to see if it's still there!
- The Master: You already know too much about us. You must remain incommunicado until the whole thing is over. I'm sorry, but those are the rules.
- John Steed: Incommunicado? Couldn't I even phone my Mother?
- The Master: Not even her.
- Tara King: [Tara has accidentally launched Steed's home made rocket] How do you stop it?
- John Steed: Eh...
- [chuckles]
- John Steed: that part of the kit arrives next week.