- Regina "Reggie" Kostas: [after typical Becker harangue] God, I hate it when he's like that.
- Jake Malinak: What, smug?
- Regina "Reggie" Kostas: No, breathing.
- Regina Reggie Kostas: Hey, you're actually smiling in this picture. Who's the woman? She's pretty.
- Dr. John Becker: My ex-wife.
- Regina Reggie Kostas: Where is she now?
- Dr. John Becker: A house fell on her sister. I haven't seen her since.
- Dr. John Becker: Well, I see a lot of fans on the wall, but I don't see any actual degrees.
- Dr. Chang: Pre-med, Cornell. Med school, Johns Hopkins.
- Dr. John Becker: Oh, yeah. Well, I went to Harvard.
- Dr. Chang: I taught at Harvard.
- Regina "Reggie" Kostas: Great, now if you are done 'measuring.'
- Regina "Reggie" Kostas: [after typical argument with Becker, and he leaves] What I wouldn't give to hear a screech and a thump right now!
- Dr. John Becker: [screech, but no thump] You missed me, ya bastard!
- Dr. John Becker: [to Margaret and the mailman] Hey, Archie, Veronica, this is a doctor's office, not the malt shoppe!
- Dr. John Becker: No, this is NOT the suicide hotline! What's your problem, man, can't you even dial a phone?
- Regina "Reggie" Kostas: [Seeing Becker's apartment for the first time] Nice place, I'm impressed - I always figured you lived below ground.
- Regina "Reggie" Kostas: [Looking at a photo] Pretty lady; who is she?
- Dr. John Becker: Oh, that's my ex-wife.
- Regina "Reggie" Kostas: Where is she now?
- Dr. John Becker: A house fell on her sister; I haven't heard from her since.