- Samantha Stephens: Why don't you come with us?
- Darrin Stephens: You're kidding.
- Samantha Stephens: I'm serious.
- Darrin Stephens: Me? Go to the North Pole? To see Santa Claus?
- Samantha Stephens: Why not? It's Christmas.
- Darrin Stephens: ...All right.
- Michael: Those aren't pillows are they?
- Santa Claus: [chuckling] No, my boy - sometimes I wish they were. I've tried all kinds of diets, but nothing works. But then again, if I got too thin, my children might not recognize me.
- Michael: I'd know you.
- Santa Claus: Yes - Yes, I think you would. But what difference does it make how we look on the outside - it's how we feel on the inside that counts, isn't it? You'll grow older and I'll grow weaker, but what we've seen with our hearts will ever remain a thing of joy and beauty.
- Santa Claus: Remember, Michael, the real happiness of Christmas is not found in what we get, but what we give.
- Samantha Stephens: [Samantha changes by magic into her witch-outfit] How's that?
- Michael: [gets interested] But where's your pointed hat?
- Samantha Stephens: Pointed hat?
- [he nods]
- Samantha Stephens: Aha, okay.
- [casts the spell and gets the hat]
- Michael: [gets more interested] That's pretty good. But where's your broom?
- Samantha Stephens: Excuse me, but is Mr. Claus very busy?
- Elf: Well, of course he's busy, what do you think this is the Fourth of July?
- Michael: I must've caught a cold somewhere last night. Well, come on. Let's open it!
- Mr. Johnson: You think we can open it right now?
- Darrin Stephens: Well, what are you going to do?
- Samantha Stephens: I thought I'd take him to see Santa Claus.
- Darrin Stephens: Another one?
- Samantha Stephens: The real one.
- Darrin Stephens: The real...? Are you telling - are you trying to tell me there really is...?
- Samantha Stephens: Of course there is, darling.
- Darrin Stephens: Where? I mean wha-whe-wha-where does he?
- Samantha Stephens: Where does he live?
- Darrin Stephens: Yeah.
- Samantha Stephens: The North Pole!