Bewitched (TV Series)

Long Live the Queen (1967)

Paul Barselou: Bartender

Quotes 

• Darrin Stephens : Well, I'm just not going to stand for it in my house. If I have to, I won't go home for a year!

  Stranger : It's just about a year since I've been home.

  Darrin Stephens : I mean it, I... It is?

  Stranger : I never should've told my mother-in-law to get out of the house! She owns it.

  Darrin Stephens : You hadn't seen your family in all that time?

  [the bartender rolls his eyes. The stranger begins sobbing] 

  Stranger : I went back once about six months ago. My kid didn't recognize me; and the dog bit me and he's my dog!

  [the stranger drops his head on the counter and sobs some more] 

  Bartender : Comes in every night and cries like that.

  Darrin Stephens : Wow.

  Bartender : You know, pal, this job gives me a chance to see some pretty good observations. Now he thinks his mother-in-law's a holy terror and you think your wife's queen of the witches. But if the truth be it known, they all got their good points. Right, pal?

  Darrin Stephens : They sure do, pal. They sure do.