Family Guy (TV Series)
Ready, Willing and Disabled (2001)
Patrick Warburton: Joe Swanson
Photos
Quotes
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Peter Griffin : Say, what happened to the car wash thief?
Joe Swanson : Ironically, I severed his spine when I landed on him.
Peter Griffin : Looks like you got more competition at next year's special people's games, huh?
Joe Swanson : Nope, he's dead.
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[a slick-looking man drives up to Joe and jumps out of his car]
Slick Guy : Jim Caplin: Sports Agent. You like this car?
Joe Swanson : Yeah.
Slick Guy : [hands over the keys] It's yours. You like these pants?
Joe Swanson : Yeah.
Slick Guy : [removes pants and hands them over] They're yours. You know what a merkin is?
Joe Swanson : No.
Slick Guy : [holds his underwear open] Pubic wig. I got one, you want it?
Joe Swanson : No!
Slick Guy : Of course not, you're a classy guy. You want to be rich?
Joe Swanson : Yeah.
Slick Guy : [takes out a contract] Sign here.
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Joe Swanson : Close the door. I don't want to see the light.