Firefly (TV Series)

Out of Gas (2002)

Adam Baldwin: Jayne Cobb

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Quotes 

• Mal : Not if all you're gonna do is sit around here and whinge about it, no.

  Wash : What do you expect me to do, Mal?

  Mal : Whatever you have to. And if you can't do it from here, then get a suit on and go outside on the side of the boat...

  Wash : And what? Wave my arms around?

  Mal : Wave your arms around, jump up and down, divert the nav sats to the transmitter... whatever.

  Wash : Divert the... - right! Because teenage pranks are fun when you're about to die!

  Mal : It'd give the beacon a boost, wouldn't it?

  Wash : Yes, Mal, it would boost the signal, but even if some passerby did happen to receive, all it would do is muck up their navigation.

  Mal : Could be that's true.

  Wash : Damn right it's true. They'd be forced to stop and dig out our signal before they could even go anyplace... well, maybe I should do that, then!

  Mal : Maybe you should!

  Wash : Okay!

  Mal : Good!

  Wash : Fine!

  Jayne : Hey! What you two think you're doing? Fightin' at a time like this? You'll use up all the air.

• Mal : Looks can be deceiving.

  Jayne : Not as deceiving as a low down, dirty... deceiver.

  Mal : Well said. Wasn't that well said, Zoë?

  Zoë : It had a kinda poetry to it, sir.

• Jayne : Now, I-nara, she's gotta have some funny whorin' stories, I'd wager.

  Inara : Oh, do I ever. Funny and sexy. You have no idea. And you never will.

• Mal : Does that seem low to you?

  Zoë : It does, sir.

  Jayne : [angrily]  That ain't low.

  Marco : Stop it!

  Jayne : Seven percent's standard.

  Mal : [laughing]  Okay. Zoë, I'm payin' you too much.

  Jayne : Why? What does she get?

  Marco : Knock it off!

  Mal : Look, forget I said anything. I'm sure you're treated very well. You get the perks, got your own room... No? You share a bunk?

• Jayne : Hey, you know, we'd have been back first, 'cept there's somethin' wrong with 'Nara's shuttle. She done somethin' to it, Mal. It smells funny.

  Inara : I told you, that's incense.

  Jayne : So you say.

• Inara : I don't discuss my clients.

  Jayne : Aww, come on, Inara. Who'd know?

  Inara : You.

  [Beat] 

  Inara : A Companion doesn't kiss and tell.

  Mal : So there is kissing?

• Kaylee : Well, Shepherd told us a funny story about being a preacher. Now you tell us a funny story about being a doctor.

  Dr. Simon Tam : Ah, a funny story.

  Jayne : Yeah, cus sick people are hi-lar-ious.

• Jayne : Tell us where the stuff's at, so I can shoot ya.

  Mal : Point of interest? Offering to shoot us might not work so well as an incentive as you might imagine.

• Mal : How much they payin' you?

  Jayne : Huh?

  Mal : I mean, let's say you did kill us... or didn't... there could be torture, whatever. But somehow, you found the goods. What would your cut be?

  Jayne : [proudly]  Seven percent, straight off the top.

  Mal : Seven. Oh.

  Jayne : What?

  Mal : Hmm? Nothin'. Not a thing. No. I just -

  [to Zoë] 

  Mal : Does that seem low to you?

  Zoë Washburne : It does, sir.

  Jayne : [angrily]  That ain't low.

  Marco : Stop it!

  Jayne : [in denial]  Seven percent's standard.

  Mal : [laughing]  Okay. Zoë, I'm payin' you too much.

  Jayne : Why? What does she get?

  Marco : Knock it off!

  Mal : Look, forget I said anything. I'm sure you're treated very well. You get the perks, got your own room...

  [surprised] 

  Mal : No? You share a bunk?