Firefly (TV Series)

War Stories (2002)

Sean Maher: Dr. Simon Tam

Quotes 

• Simon : I never - never shot anyone before.

  Book : I was there, son. I'm fair sure you haven't shot anyone yet.

• Simon : Did you do anything today?

  River Tam : Played with Kaylee. The sun came out, and I walked on my feet and heard with my ears. I hate the bits, the bits that stay down and I work, I f-function like I'm a girl. I hate it because I know it'll go away! The sun grows dark and chaos has come again. It's... fluids. What am I?

  Simon : You are my beautiful sister.

  River Tam : I-I threw up on your bed.

  Simon : Yep. Definitely my sister.

• Zoë Washburne : We're getting him back.

  Jayne : What are we gonna do - clone him?

  Dr. Simon Tam : Well, it's a clean cut. With the right equipment, I should be able to re-attach it. That's assuming there's a head.

• Book : I'd forgotten, you're moonlighting as a criminal mastermind now. Got your next heist planned?

  Simon : No... but I'm thinking about growing a big black mustache. I'm a traditionalist.

• Simon : Sadistic crap legitimized by florid prose. Tell me you're not a fan.

• Book : Did you ever read the works of Shan Yu?

  Simon : Shan Yu the psychotic dictator?

  Book : Yep. Fancied himself quite the warrior poet. Wrote volumes on war, torture, the limits of human endurance.

  Simon : That's nice.