- Harvey Millrocks: Uh, did I hear a car, dear?
- Martha Millrock: It's that noisy Fred Flintstone and his shadow, Barney Rubble.
- Harvey Millrocks: Oh, boy. Probably with another one of their harebrained schemes.
- [Fred and Barney approach a construction worker asleep on a sign]
- Fred Flintstone: Oh, boy, what a shot.
- Barney Rubble: Uh, you mean that sign that says "Men At Work"?
- Fred Flintstone: Yeah, but what's this guy doing?
- Barney Rubble: Just sleeping, that's all. Hey, that's funny!
- [laughs]
- Fred Flintstone: Yeah, yeah. Ssh! Ssh! Now, be quiet. I don't want to wake him up and spoil the shot. A picture like this should be worth a bundle.
- [focuses the camera]
- Fred Flintstone: Now, to make sure I got everything in, and the focus is just right.
- [the construction worker wakes up and punches Fred]
- Construction Worker: A picture like that could lose me my job, wise guy. Very funny.
- Barney Rubble: You think that's funny, you should have seen him taking baby pictures!
- Betty Rubble: Gee, I wouldn't want to miss that sale. I hope the boys aren't late for lunch.
- Wilma Flintstone: Are you kidding? The last time Fred was late for a meal was, um... um... Come to think of it, he's got a perfect eating record.
- Fred Flintstone: Wilma!
- Wilma Flintstone: And still undefeated... Fred Flintstone!
- Fred Flintstone: [while driving] If I do much more picking up, somebody's gonna have to pick me up off the floor.
- Fred Flintstone: Hey, hold it, hooold it! What do you think you're doing?
- Boy: I'm buying a comic book.
- Fred Flintstone: Not that one, you ain't. I was just gonna look at it.
- Boy: But this is the one I want.
- Fred Flintstone: The rules of this game, sonny, is first come first serve.
- Boy: Well, I got it first.
- Fred Flintstone: But I seen it first.
- Boy: Oh, yeah? We'll see about that.
- [leaves]
- Fred Flintstone: Don't they teach kids manners anymore?
- [Fred reads the comic book and laughs for a while, but the clerk soon comes and takes it]
- Fred Flintstone: Hey, wait a minute, I'm not finished yet.
- Harry: I have a paying customer for this magazine. Do you mind?
- [the boy pays him]
- Harry: Thank you.
- Fred Flintstone: Snitcher.
- Fred Flintstone: Hiya, girls. What's for lunch?
- Wilma Flintstone: The usual, a 5-pound brontosaurus steak.
- Fred Flintstone: When are you gonna have something different?
- Betty Rubble: Like what, Mr. Flintstone?
- Fred Flintstone: Like a 10-pound brontosaurus steak.
- Barney Rubble: Staying home on our vacation is the best idea we ever had, Fred. Uh, it'll save us a lot of dough.
- Fred Flintstone: Yeah, but I didn't figure we'd have to do the shopping.
- Barney Rubble: Well, what's the difference? Uh, we didn't have nothing to do anyway.
- Fred Flintstone: Maybe you didn't, Barney, but this was going to be my put-and-take week.
- Barney Rubble: Put-and-take? What does that mean?
- Fred Flintstone: I was going to put a couple of points on my bowling score and take a couple off my golf score.
- Barney Rubble: But, uh, Fred, we don't know nothing about photography.
- Fred Flintstone: What's to know? You point the camera and snap the picture.
- Barney Rubble: Yeah, but, uh, how do you know what to point the camera at?
- Fred Flintstone: It tells how in the book. The best pictures are subjects that excite the photographer most. It's easy.
- Barney Rubble: Well, you mean you can make a living just taking pictures of food?
- Fred Flintstone: Baby doll, how would you like to be the wife of a very wealthy photographer?
- Wilma Flintstone: Uh-uh. I'd rather stay married to you.
- Fred Flintstone: Say, now, this looks interesting.
- [grabs a book]
- Fred Flintstone: Wow. "Real Horrible Tales."
- [Fred opens the book and a bat flies out of it, making him close the book in fright]
- Fred Flintstone: Well, they don't have to make 'em THAT real!
- [Barney is sitting on a flagpole, hoping to find news]
- Barney Rubble: Hey, Fred, I've been up here for an hour already. This ain't news unless I break the flagpole-sitting record.
- Fred Flintstone: Well, what's the record?
- Barney Rubble: 104 days.
- Fred Flintstone: Oooh, now he tells me.
- Fred Flintstone: Wilma, baby. We're home!
- Betty Rubble: Mmm, Fred sounds pretty cheerful.
- Wilma Flintstone: Yes. It worries me.
- Fred Flintstone: Ssh!
- Barney Rubble: What's up, Fred?
- Fred Flintstone: You hear anything?
- [a chirping sound is heard]
- Barney Rubble: Well, uh, just birds chirping.
- Fred Flintstone: Just birds? There's a pterodactyl nest around here. Don't that mean anything to you?
- Barney Rubble: Uh, yeah. I-It means there's a mother pterodactyl around someplace and I'm getting the heck out of here!
- Fred Flintstone: Step back, everybody. When I get her to smile, snap her picture quick, Barney-boy. Now, my little angel, smile.
- [tickles the Millrocks' baby]
- Fred Flintstone: Coochie, coochie, coochie.
- [makes a funny face]
- Fred Flintstone: Come on, give me that great big smile.
- [makes another funny face]
- Fred Flintstone: Come on, give it to me.
- [the baby punches her bowl of baby food, knocking it into Fred's face]
- Barney Rubble: She sure gave it to ya!