George Burns: George Burns

Quotes 

• [George and Gracie are on a train] 

  Gracie Allen : Oh George, I'm on a diet, do you mind if I ride backwards while I eat?

  George Burns : What's that got to do with a diet?

  Gracie Allen : Well, when you ride backwards, the train keeps pulling you away from the food and you don't eat too much!

• George Burns : How do you like that, Jack Benny stealing my opening joke - and a great joke! I can't understand it. We've been friends for years, we've been friends all our lives, we started in vaudeville together. Why, I knew Jack when he was really 39! We had quite a fight up in San Francisco last night, I was gonna take a swing at him but I didn't wanna hit a man with gray hair... but wait 'til I catch him without it!