- Eb Dawson: Mr. Douglas, guess what? The town's taking up a collection for you for gettin' the road paved!
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: They are?
- Eb Dawson: Yeah! They're goin' around to all the farms in the valley collectin' chicken feathers! And Mr. Ziffel's donatin' the tar!
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: Tar and feathers?
- Lisa Douglas: Isn't that nice?
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: What's - ?
- Eb Dawson: It's the only thing they could think of since Mr. Edmund left town. He was the only one who knew how to make a hangman's knot.
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: [meeting the senator to get the road paved] Senator, we live in Hooterville and we need your help.
- Senator Talbot: If you live in Hooterville, you DO need help.
- Lisa Douglas: [recognizes senator from the late, late show] Ohhh, you must be the fellow who was in Death Valley Days!
- Oliver Wendell Douglas: No, that was Ronald Reagan.
- Lisa Douglas: Who?
- Senator Talbot: Ronald Reagan. He's the governor of California.
- Lisa Douglas: Well then, which movie star are you?
- Senator Talbot: [smugly, as a star] Lyle Talbot!
- Lisa Douglas: Oh. I guess I never saw you.