Joan of Arcadia (TV Series)

The Rise & Fall of Joan Girardi (2005)

Michael Welch: Luke Girardi

Quotes 

• Luke Girardi : I'm sixteen, Grace. I've been waiting to drive my whole life.

  Grace Polk : Dude, you're contributing to global warming, and you're handing over vital personal information to the CIA. And when they take that picture, that's really a retinal scan.

  Luke Girardi : Yeah, I'm... I'm getting my license, Grace. I'm not starting a covert war.

  Joan Girardi : Is this like pillow talk for you two?

  Grace Polk : Fighting for the environment is not a war.

  Luke Girardi : I just wanna drive a big machine.

  Grace Polk : Is that really all that men are about?

  Joan Girardi : Apparently.

• Will Girardi : [reading Kevin's article]  "And in a heroic moment, Ms. Girardi tackled her friend, knocking her from the path of an oncoming truck."

  Kevin Girardi : Nice, huh?

  Joan Girardi : You made me sound like Catwoman.

  Helen Girardi : I thought it was an SUV.

  Luke Girardi : Actually, the Transportation Safety Administration classifies all SUVs as light trucks. Taking my driver's test Thursday.

• Will Girardi : You used the word "hero" seven times.

  Helen Girardi : In the Metro section? Thought you said last night they'd bury it on the comics page.

  Kevin Girardi : Well, my editor thought Joan the Hero was too good for "Hagar the Horrible".

  Joan Girardi : It was more like a momentary loss of brain function.

  Luke Girardi : Well, bravery can be seen as having a correlation of impaired judgment. Napoleon marching on Moscow...

  Joan Girardi : Grace going out with you.

• Grace Polk : [Luke is celebrating getting his driver's license]  So you did it, huh? Who cares about the polar ice cap melting? You just pack the penguins in your car. You can all do a drive-thru for a Burrito Grande.

  Luke Girardi : Okay, can the preamble, Grace. If you're gonna do it, just do it, okay? I am a gas-guzzling, smog-spewing tool of a corrupt oil-based economy. So just break up with me, because I am never gonna live up to your expectations.

  Grace Polk : Dude, you've endowed me with entirely too much power.

  Luke Girardi : But you said...

  Grace Polk : I say a lot of things. I'm just a simple anarchist trying to get through my day. You do your thing, I do mine.

  Luke Girardi : So you'll ride with me?

  Grace Polk : [laughing]  Yeah, right. Let me go get my fur coat.

  [she starts to leave] 

  Grace Polk : I will see you in the biology closet at 3:00.

  Luke Girardi : [confused]  What just happened?

  Friedman : Who cares? Shotgun!