Life with Louie (TV Series)

Caddy on a Hot Tin Roof (1996)

Louie Anderson: Narrator, Andy Anderson (Dad), Little Louie

Quotes 

• JoJo Stomopolis : Alright, Louie, give me a tee.

  [Expects a golf tee] 

  Louie : Tee!

  Jojo Stomopolis : What? Give me a tee.

  Louie : Tee!

  Jojo Stomopolis : Are you listening? I said give me a tee!

  Louie : [Spreads arms]  Tee!

  Jojo Stomopolis : I'm guessing this is going to be a long day.

• Louie Anderson : I'm supposed to be your caddy *and* carry your clubs?

• Jojo Stomopolis : Where's my two iron?

  Louie Anderson : Well you used it on the tenth hole.

  Jojo Stomopolis : Yeah, and...?

  Louie Anderson : Well, I thought you were done with it.

  Jojo Stomopolis : So you left it there?

  Louie Anderson : I'm supposed to carry these things to every hole?

• Louie Anderson : I'm tellin' ya, Dad, computers. They're the wave of the future. Jojo says so.

  Andy Anderson : Thanks for the tip, Louie, I'll be sure to invest my nest egg. Hey, Honey, how much is my nest egg?

  Ora Anderson : [Looking in cookie jar]  Three dollars and two oatmeal delights.

• Andy Anderson : [sarcastically]  Computers. Ha ha. There's a real growth industry. A passing fad if I ever heard one.

• [Grunewald is throwing pebbles at Louie's window to wake him up] 

  Andy Anderson : Hey Grunewald, ever hear of a doorbell?

  Grunewald : I don't wanna wake everybody up.

• Andy Anderson : What do you need a horn for? You were blessed with a big mouth. Use it.

• Louie : But all my friends have new horns.

  Andy Anderson : Well, if all your friends had new motocycles, would you want one too?

  Louie : Well, yeah.

  Andy Anderson : Ah, that backfired.

• Louie : I should go to clown school, at least I'd get a horn there.

• Andy Anderson : Louie, light of my life, my favorite son, you want to watch the Nightsniffer marathon, eat some pizza and donuts, huh, kid?

  Louie : Love to, Dad, but someone's gotta bring home the bacon 'round here.

  Andy Anderson : What am I, chopped liver?

• Ora Anderson : Some day, you're going to learn that there are some things in life that are more important than money.

  Louie : I know, it's just that it takes a lot of money to buy all those things. Ciao, Mother.