M*A*S*H (TV Series)
Morale Victory (1980)
Loretta Swit: Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan
Photos
Quotes
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Col. Sherman T. Potter : Having some trouble over there, Winchester?
Maj. Charles Winchester : Au contraire, Colonel. Thanks to an incomparable display of surgical prestidigitation, this lad will still have two legs to stand on when he gives me the ovation I so richly deserve.
Capt. Benjamin Franklin 'Hawkeye' Pierce : Ah, the immortal words of Elizabeth Barrett Winchester: How do I love me? Let me count the ways.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt : Yowsa, yowsa. Once again from the Arrogance Ballroom, you've just heard Satchmo Winchester blowing his own horn.
Maj. Charles Winchester : Ha ha ha ha. Spew on, supercilious twits. This lad was a mélange of mortar fragments, an airtight candidate for amputation. But an arterial graft here, a bit of tendon repair there, and this boy shall soon be walking home.
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : How about the hand, doctor?
Maj. Charles Winchester : Well, there's slight damage to the flexor tendon and the neurovascular bundle.
Col. Sherman T. Potter : Winchester, you've got a silo full of smug, but you sure know which end of a scalpel is up.
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Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : My nurses would love a supply of cosmetics.
[Margaret hands the list to Hawkeye]
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : Here's the list. I'd like it filled immediately, please.
Capt. Benjamin Franklin 'Hawkeye' Pierce : Happy to be of service, Major.
[Hawkeye hands the list to B.J]
Capt. Benjamin Franklin 'Hawkeye' Pierce : Here you are, Beej.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt : [B.J. hands the list to Klinger] There you are, Klinger.
Cpl. Maxwell Q. Klinger : What is this? You guys are really great morale officers. "Klinger, put up a suggestion box." "Klinger, get 'Gone With the Wind'." "Klinger, go to the drugstore."
[He begins to exit]
Cpl. Maxwell Q. Klinger : Pardon me.
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : Where are you going?
Cpl. Maxwell Q. Klinger : To build a suggestion box. I got a DOOZY to stick in it.
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Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : Ah! The morale officers. Let's talk morale.
[Margaret opens a manual]
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : "Army and Air Force exchanges directly affect soldier welfare and morale by supplying items of comfort and necessity." Paragraph 86, section C, U.S. Army Field Manual.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt : We're in trouble, Hawk, It's manual warfare.