Married... with Children (TV Series)

A Little Off the Top (1993)

Christina Applegate: Kelly Bundy

Quotes 

• Bud Bundy : Man, just when you thought all the disasters that could happen to Dad, have happened to Dad.

  Kelly Bundy : Yeah. Circumsision. And we thought he was in a mood when they cut his hair too short. Now we can't even tell him it will grow back.

  [thinks it over] 

  Kelly Bundy : Can we?

  Bud Bundy : Why not? We lied about his hair!

  [busy with clearing away stacks of magazines] 

  Bud Bundy : I just hope we got all Dad's magazines. You know, when Mom called, she said it was very important to get rid of everything that would turn Dad on before he'd had a chance to heal.

  Kelly Bundy : [incredulous]  Wow, thirty days without sex. What's that like?

  Bud Bundy : Thirty days is nothing! I mean, I've gone as...

  [swallows his words as he stares into Kelly's cat-that-got-all-the-cream grin] 

  Bud Bundy : Why, I don't know!

• Kelly Bundy : They're here! Quick, hide all this stuff!

  Bud Bundy : What about this 'People' magazine?

  Kelly Bundy : Who's on the cover?

  Bud Bundy : It's Ross Perot.

  Kelly Bundy : Hide it. Dad once told me that he thought his big ears looked like tiny little hooters.

  Bud Bundy : [looks at the magazine cover]  Dad is sick!

  [however after second look at it, Bud wraps up the magazine and shoves it down his pants to take away with him]