Married... with Children (TV Series)

A Shoe Room with a View (1995)

Ed O'Neill: Al Bundy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Matilda : I don't understand it. I was a size six before aerobics class. All that jumping must have expanded my foot.

  Al : Then I see you must have fallen on your butt a time or two.

  Matilda : How dare you say that to my face!

  Al : Well, I'd say it behind your back, but my car's only got half a tank of gas!

• Gary : Out with it, Bundy, what's your store idea?

  Al : Anything but an aerobics studio.

  Gary : You called me all the way down here to suggest anything but an aerobics studio?

  Al : Yeah, what do you say?

  Gary : I'd say you're fired if I weren't sure you'd make more on unemployment.

• Al : I'm offering you a membership to No Ma'am, Chicago's most exclusive men's club. And with the membership comes - hold on to your green card - luxury boxes at Wrestlemania, free use of a classic Dodge - when it's working, and a key to the Big 'Uns reading room in my garage - when we get the bowl unclogged.

• Al : What has he got that I don't have? We're both virile men in the prime of our lives. Except he's not saddled with a lazy wife, worthless kids, prostate like a melon and worst of all, I sell women's shoes.

• Melissa : You never buy us shoes.

  Ramon : Do I not leave the curtain open when I change?

  Taylor : That's not shoes. We want to work out next to the shoe guy.

  Al : Formerly known as Al. Oh and I was just joshing about that melon thing.

• Ramon : You shoe salesmen, you're so lucky. How do you do it?

  Al : Well, Ramon, you see since the dawn of time, women and shoes have gone together like alcohol and fire arms. Sure we men of the foot might have a slight PR problem, but once you've tried shoe you never go back. Who loves you, baby?

  [Turns around and falls out the window;crashes] 

• Al : I'll be going. Don't bother to get the elevator, I'll just jump out the window.

• Al Bundy : What would be better, right next door, than an aerobics studio?

  Griff : A topless aerobics studio?

• Melissa : Fat-free muffin?

  Al Bundy : You certainly are.