Married... with Children (TV Series)

Buck Saves the Day (1989)

David Faustino: Bud Bundy

Quotes 

• Al Bundy : Okay kids, we get out of here alive what are we going to do? Victor.

  Victor : Never marry.

  Al Bundy : That's right. So remember, kids, when you meet a woman, no matter how nice she is or what she looks like, remember: women get worse. They get...

  Victor : Older.

  Joey : Meaner.

  Bud Bundy : Fatter?

• [a delirious Steve moans in pain from poison oak exposure and animal bites] 

  Victor : What's wrong with Mr. Rhoades?

  Al Bundy : He's dying, Victor.

  Steve Rhoades : [sing-song]  Thus dies the house of Agamemnon.

  [pirate accent] 

  Steve Rhoades : Tie him to the yardarm, Mr. Christian!

  [British accent] 

  Steve Rhoades : Oh, look father, I sat in something icky!

  Bud Bundy : Should I get a club, Dad?

  Al Bundy : Nah, at least watching him gives us something to do.

  [gagging sound] 

  Bud Bundy : Oh, cool, he's foaming again!

• Bud Bundy : [Steve is groaning]  Can't we shut him up?

  Al Bundy : We need him, Bud. He's keeping the animals away.

• Bud Bundy : Have a good time, Dad.

  Al Bundy : Uh, not so fast, Dan'l junior. See, if I'm a goin', you're a goin'. The only difference is I'm a comin' back.