Married... with Children (TV Series)

Bud on the Side (1997)

Ed O'Neill: Al Bundy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Al : I'm talking 'bout a break room, Peg. At work. With massage tables and a fridge full of beer. As long as Bud keeps Gary happy, I'm happy. And as long as I'm happy... I'm happy.

  Peggy : Yeah, well, what about me?

  Al : Don't be selfish, Peg.

• Al : And love and marriage go together like... Peg, what do love and marriage go together like?

  Peggy : How the hell should I know?

• Al : Beer and Tang, Bundy Mimosas

• Griff : Al, lighten up. You didn't have a problem when Kelly dated that wealthy older man.

  Al : I wouldn't have a problem if BUD dated a wealthy older man. Anybody but Gary.

• Peggy Bundy : Al, would you relax? You told Bud to find someone desperate.

  Al : [referring to his boss, Gary]  When I said aim low, I didn't think he'd excabate the Tar PITS!

• Jefferson D'Arcy : Who cares if Gary's a tarantula in Chanel? I've seen worse.

  Al : You married worse.

  Jefferson D'Arcy : Exactly.

• Kelly Bundy : Which side does the salad spork go on again?

  Peggy Bundy : On the left, who raised you?

  Kelly Bundy : No one. How come you don't put out the good plastic for my boyfriends?

  Al : 'Cause your boyfriends don't use utensils.

• Peggy Bundy : Look, Gary's gold card!

  Al : Hey, forget about fried chicken, tonight it's fried lobster.

  Peggy Bundy : Wait a second, shouldn't we wait for Bud?

  Al : What's he need lobster for? He's got dignity.