- Peggy Bundy: Al, did you really mean what you said about me? You really think I do nothing?
- Al Bundy: Peg, if you did any less around here, it would be called 'haunting'.
- Al Bundy: [to Kelly] Honey, this modeling thing isn't working out, but I have an idea. Why don't you take the skills you've acquired at modeling school and get an important job. One where you meet the public, and serve them french fries.
- Kelly: [practicing for her upcoming modeling audition] The new... oh, what's the name of the stupid car?
- Bud: Kelly, why don't you just write it on your hand, like you do your name?
- Kelly: No, wait... Topeka! I have found it.
- Bud: I don't think you mean 'Topeka', Kel.
- Kelly: Oh yeah, that's right. I meant, 'Eurethra'.