Married... with Children (TV Series)

The Two That Got Away (1995)

Donna D'Errico: Helga

Photos 

Quotes 

• Al Bundy : Jefferson, would you stop taking pictures so we can enjoy this place?

  [two bussom blond ladies enter] 

  Al Bundy : Jefferson, would you start taking pictures so we can enjoy this place?

  Helga : Willkimen! We are your Swedish masseuses. I'm Helga.

  Inga : I'm Inga.

  Al Bundy : [leering]  And I'm Alga.

  Jefferson D'Arcy : And I'm gaga.

  Inga : May we carry your bags in for you?

  Al Bundy : Jefferson, we died and went to the land of milk and... honeys!

• Randolph : Mr. Bundy and Mr. D'Arcy? I'm Randolph the innkeeper. I've been trying to get ahold of you. I want to tell you that there's been a slight change in your cabin assignments.

  Jefferson D'Arcy : What's the change?

  Randolph : You don't have one.

  Al Bundy : That's okay. We'll just bunk in with Helga and Inga.

  Helga : Ja, sure.

  Randolph : Helga, Inga, you're late for topless happy hour.

  [Helga and Inga exit] 

  Jefferson D'Arcy : [to Randolph]  Hey, you can't just bump us out of here. We made our reservation for this place over a year ago. Here's the paperwork with our confirmation number.

  Randolph : [takes the paper from Jefferson and tears it in two; rude tone]  So you did.

  Al Bundy : Hey, why'd you do that? What's your problem?

  Randolph : Let me explain something. You're nobodies and you have a reservation. Shannon Tweed is a famous actress and she doesn't have a reservation. Explanation over, now get off my property.