- Al: Ah, I'm not gonna let you ruin this for me, Peg.
- [sounding very forced]
- Al: Yep, this is my vacation, and I'm a-having fun.
- [inhales deeply]
- Al: I'm loving this.
- Al: [There is a short pause, then Al stops smiling and starts vigorously honking the horn; with frustration] Move! Move! I can't take anymore! Oh God, you're killing me!
- [honking some more]
- Al: Move! Move!
- [Al buries his head in the wheel]
- Al: We're gonna go where people pretend to want to go when they can't afford to go someplace good. We're gonna see America. We take no map. We'll follow the sun. Stay in cheap motels and steal what we need along the way. We go west, past the cheese factories, where the air is fresh, the sky is big, and a man can still kill his dinner with his car. Guys, tomorrow we put the pedal to the metal and we ride with the wind.
- Bud: The babes will be calling plenty soon. I'm a senior now. A mover. A shaker. I'm the man. I've got the juice. Yup, when I was a freshman, they flushed my head down the toilet. When I was a sophomore, they flushed my head down the toilet. When I was a junior, I was getting cool, so they let me flush it myself. But now I'm a senior. And ready to rule. This year he's back, he's cool, he's dry.
- Kelly: Until he goes to sleep.
- Peggy: Gee, Al, uh, think you could slow down? My hair is just whipping in the wind.
- [to Bud and Kelly]
- Peggy: He's not scaring you, is he, kids?
- [Bud puts his hand to his ear]
- Bud: [with sarcasm] Sorry, Mom, I couldn't hear you over the 'roar' of the engine.
- Kelly: Come on, leave Daddy alone. I mean, how could he possibly know there would be a TRAFFIC JAM on LABOR DAY?
- [Kelly looks at Al accusingly]
- Al: [trying to stay calm] Shut up.
- Al: Everybody, I have an announcement. Your happiness... sickens me. Everybody but me is looking at good times. But for me it's been one long continuous year since I got married. Actually, one long month. Helluary.
- Peggy: Come on kids. We can still see Mark Spitz and Greg Louganis in "Swim Gyms". It's the story about synchronised swimmers who solve crimes in their spare time.
- Kelly: My high school diploma. I couldn't wait for the mail man to come, so I just took it out of his truck. I am a high school graduate! Read it to me , Mom. What does it say? What does it say?