- Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: [about Fran's attire] I wouldn't be caught dead in that dress.
- Niles: You'd have to be dead six months to fit into it.
- Chastity Claire 'C.C.' Babcock: Niles, move it with the food. These society women are vultures. Where's the paté?
- Niles: Why don't you just lie on the floor and let them peck at your liver?!
- Fran Fine: [to Max] But this is the rock world, you know, I mean it's way out of your sphere.
- Maxwell Sheffield: I'll have you know I was staging 'Happenings' on Carnaby Street while you were still scouring the semi-annual clearance sale at Toys 'R' Us. Does the word Donovan mean anything to you?
- Fran Fine: [excited] Oh, I loved him!
- [sings and snaps fingers]
- Fran Fine: they call me Mellow Yellow...
- Maxwell Sheffield: Quite rightly!
- [Maggie and Brighton appear to look bored]
- Fran Fine: [pondering] Meanwhile, explain to me Lucy In the Sky With Diamonds. 'The girl with colitis goes by'? I always thought that was very distasteful.
- Maxwell Sheffield: [correcting her about the song line] That's 'the girl with kaleidoscope eyes' Miss Fine.
- Fran Fine: [relieved] Oh! leave it to Flushing to turn a beautiful image into a bowel dysfunction.
- [Fran is reading personal ads to Niles]
- Fran Fine: Oh, look, here's a gem. "Young bi-couple, digs snakes, contact Theoni, PO Box 666, no weirdos."
- Fran Fine: I don't want to be Vanna. I wanna buy the vowel. I wanna solve the puzzle!
- Val Toriello: Oh, Fran!
- [puts her hand upon her chest, fawning]
- Val Toriello: You should write that down!