- Dan Scott: Looks like you finally grew a pair!
- Keith Scott: I always had a pair Danny. Just ask your wife.
- Haley James: Brooke I know about birth control, okay? My mom sat me down a long time ago and asked me if I was more afraid of getting Herpes or pregnant.
- Brooke: And what did you say?
- Haley James: I said "I haven't even kissed a boy, I'm only seven"
- Brooke: Your mom was progressive!
- Haley James: I don't wanna lie to my husband.
- Brooke: I guess thats in the vows, huh? I wonder if you knew that when you signed up at the ripe old age of, like, 12.
- Lucas Scott: H. L. Mencken once wrote:"Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats."