Sanford and Son (TV Series)

Fred's Treasure Garden (1974)

Nathaniel Taylor: Rollo Larson

Quotes 

• Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : [while ravenously eating Grady's wild parsley salad]  That is delicious! Oughtta be a crime for a salad to be this good.

  Rollo Larson : In most states it is.

• Lamont Sanford : [Thinking of what to do with the marijuana plants]  We gotta think of some way to get rid of that stuff.

  Rollo Larson : Hey, don't worry, baby! I'll do it.

  Lamont Sanford : Wait a minute! I know - I'll burn it!

  Rollo Larson : That's exactly what I had in mind!

• Rollo Larson : [enters the yard]  Say, my man, what are you doing?

  Lamont Sanford : Hey, Rollo, what's happening, man? Look here, I want to ask you a question: uh... does that look like wild parsley to you?

  Rollo Larson : You mean, that marijuana?

  Rollo Larson : Say, look here baby, it's just about ready to be harvested, too!

  Lamont Sanford : Yeah, well, just stay away from it, Rollo.

  Rollo Larson : Hey man, don't worry, there's enough for everybody!

  Lamont Sanford : Rollo, just stay away from it now! Now get in the house!

  [Lamont brings Rollo into the house] 

• Rollo Larson : Now, we know we can't burn it.

  Lamont Sanford : No, we can't burn it, man.

  Rollo Larson : Yeah, and we can't wrap it up in a bundle with paper, because it would stick out like a sore thumb.

  Lamont Sanford : Yeah, it would stick out like a sore thumb.

  Rollo Larson : Yeah, and somebody would find it.

  Lamont Sanford : Somebody would find it.

  Rollo Larson : So, here's what I'll do.

  Lamont Sanford : Yeah?

  Rollo Larson : Instead of wrapping it up in a huge piece of paper...

  Lamont Sanford : Yeah?

  Rollo Larson : And throwing it out, instead, I'll just get some little pieces of paper about this size, ya dig? And I'll take the marijuana little by little, and wrap it up in those little pieces of paper, hmm, and I'll get rid of it all, one by one.

• Lamont Sanford : It's right over here. Now, I want you to know, I'm bringing you over here as a friend, not as a policeman, and not in your official capacity. Now, I'm just gonna come right and be honest with you, and tell you - it's gone.

  Officer 'Smitty' Smith : What's gone?

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : Well, Officer Smith, I think we should be a bit more official about this inquiry. Now, uh... what's gone?

  Lamont Sanford , Rollo Larson : [overlapping]  It was the parsley. It was the wheelbarrow.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : Hmm?

  Lamont Sanford , Rollo Larson : [overlapping]  It was the wheelbarrow. It was the parsley.

  Lamont Sanford : It was a wheelbarrow full of parsley.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : [writes in his notepad]  A wheelbarrow full of parsley. Now, that's not your everyday robbery.

  Lamont Sanford : Well, I guess whoever it belonged to must've come and taken it away, so it was a false alarm.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : Now wait, why would anyone put parsley in a wheelbarrow?

  Rollo Larson : Well, I guess they wanted to make deliveries.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : Make - All right, now did we establish that this wheelbarrow was full of parsley?

  Lamont Sanford : No, partially.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : Partially full, or partially parsley?

  Lamont Sanford : Partially parsley.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : [writes in his notepad]  Partially parsley.

  Rollo Larson : Possibly.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : Possibly partially parsley.

  Lamont Sanford : Probably.

  Officer 'Hoppy' Hopkins : Probably, possibly, partially parsley.