Seinfeld (TV Series)

The Ticket (1992)

Jerry Seinfeld: Jerry Seinfeld

Photos 

Quotes 

• Kramer : Yo-Yo Ma!

  Jerry Seinfeld : What? Yo-Yo Ma?

  Kramer : What about him?

  Jerry Seinfeld : You just said, 'Yo-Yo Ma'.

  George Costanza : What's 'Yo-Yo Ma'?

  Jerry Seinfeld : He's a cellist.

  [to Kramer] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : You should see a doctor today.

• [last lines] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : Many states in the country now have traffic school when you have an infraction. I went to traffic school. I didn't mind it. I kind of felt bad for the traffic school instructor. This guy goes to traffic school every day, no matter how he drives. What is his incentive to not speed? He's going to traffic school anyway. Why not get a race car, do 200 miles an hour down the street? Cop stops you. "Where're you going? -- Traffic school. -- Go ahead. And you better hurry. You really need it." Maybe the punishment should be, instead of traffic school or traffic court, just traffic. They sentence you to 100 hours of traffic. They assign, like, five people to drive all around you at five miles an hour wherever you go. You're on your way to Vegas, there isn't a car in sight... "Come on. Move it!"