- Sonny: Gee, thanks, Governor Reagan.
- Governor Ronald Reagan: Oh, you can call me by my first name.
- Sonny: Governor?
- [the Gov. nods]
- Sonny: Governor, as a matter of fact, I like nothing better than watching your movies on The Late Show, nothing.
- Governor Ronald Reagan: Hm, that's funny. So do I.
- Governor Ronald Reagan: [reading a speech originally written for the dedication of the Cucamonga County Fair] My fellow Californians, as I stand here on the... Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour, I am truly blessed by nature's bounty. On my left, I see a beautiful, luscious tomato. And on my right, the world's biggest vegetable.
- The fair Princess Pamela Ann: They say I'm made of stone, but you'll notice, everyone wants a piece of the rock.