Tales from the Crypt (TV Series)

Abra Cadaver (1991)

John Kassir: Crypt Keeper

Quotes 

• Crypt Keeper : Ah, a corpse by any other name would smell as sweet. Unless of course, it isn't dead yet.

  [laughs] 

  Crypt Keeper : Tonight's tawdry tale is about a man who's gravely concerned about matters of life and death. Why he'd care about that remains to be seen.

  [laughs] 

  Crypt Keeper : I call this putrid piece... "Abra Cadaver".

• Crypt Keeper : Tsk, tsk, tsk. And Carl thought he was the family's practical joker. Want to play doctor? Then, open wide and say

  [screams, then laughs]