Tales from the Crypt (TV Series)

Cold War (1996)

Jane Horrocks: Cammy

Quotes 

• Ford : Don't you see? That's our bond! We're in this together! We're two of a kind!

  Cammy : I don't believe that anymore... people are more accepting...

  Ford : People are shit!

• Jimmy Picket : You ever tasted zombie blood? It's putrid! Like beer that's gone bad. One sip and you are shittin' your stomach linin' into the bowl!

  Ford : I gotta hand it to ya, bloodsucker, you paint a pretty picture, trouble is, not one word of it's true!

  Cammy : He's right! We're no different than you!

  Jimmy Picket : Blasphemy! Your kind are garbage eaters! Mindless, lazy critters who live off the flesh of the dead! You feast on what we vampires throw away! Now bow down to me, bitch and show your master some respect!

• Cammy : Ford, don't be such a wanker! This isn't a good idea and you know it!

  Ford : I don't know what a "wanker" is and I don't care. Look, a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Whoever heard of puttin' a laundromat in a bank?

• Ford : Cam, Cam, Cammy, Cammy! You've got every right to be breathin' fire here, no-one says you don't, but, uh, the spray on that bird gun is pretty wide, honey.

  Cammy : Your point being?

  Ford : Well, my point being we've got a better chance of gettin' out of here alive if you use what's between your legs instead of that thunderstick in your hands.

• Cammy : I'm tired, Ford. I want out.

  Ford : There is no way out. Face up to it, we belong together. You gonna tell me why? You know the answer, tell me.

  Cammy : 'Cos we're zombies...

  Ford : That's right. Ghouls... the walking dead... whatever you want to call us, we're no longer part of the world out there. The living can't be trusted.

  Jimmy Picket : Neither can the dead!

• Cammy : Going somewhere?

  Jimmy Picket : I'm going to tear your head from your shoulders and stick out your throat!

  Ford : Tell it to someone who cares! You can't kill us, we're already dead!

  Cammy : He's right! Fight's over, Count Chocula! You can walk away peaceful, or in pieces! Your choice!

• Cammy : I thought you said this beautiful borough had a bank?

  Ford : Shut up!

  Cammy : How sweet, Ford! D'you French kiss your mother with that mouth?

  Cutter : Nice one!

• Cammy : Ford, if they don't kill ya, I'm gonna do it myself!

  Ford : Yeah, promises, promises... hey, be cool kids! Okay? Let's just be cool here! I'm a firm believer in the teachings of Buddha, and like the fat man always said; first come, first served!

• Cammy : Ford.

  Ford : What the hell ya been doin' all day, baby?

  Jimmy Picket : I think you mean who.

• Cammy : What did you call me?!

  Jimmy Picket : A name. Worthy of your species... dog!

  Ford : Hey! You're gonna regret that!

  Cammy : Bitch!? That's what I thought you said! Kiss my zombie arse, motherfucker!

• Cammy : If I ever see that bloodsucking rodent again, I'm gonna break both his wings!

• Armed Robber #1 : Drop it, bitch!

  Cammy : Bitch?!

  Ford : Shit...

  Cammy : Who the *hell* do you think you're talking to?

  Ford : No!

  Armed Robber #1 : Drop it, or he's dead!

  Cammy : In your dreams! I'm gonna wear your ears on a fackin' necklace, kato!

  Armed Robber #1 : Don't call me kato, bitch!

  Cammy : Then don't call me bitch, kato!