Waiting for God (TV Series)
The Thief (1991)
Stephanie Cole: Diana Trent
Quotes
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Diana : If you recall, Tom, the last time you attempted to sew buttons on your trousers, we spent three hours at the hospital and you were offered serious counseling by the local rabbi.
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[first lines]
Tom : [playing chess] Look, please, Diana.
Diana : Well, are you going to make your move, or have I got time to bash out a quick novel?
Tom : I'm thinking.
Diana : Yes, I know. I can hear the terrible crunching of long rusted gears and the tired creaking of a machine in pain.
Tom : Very poetic.
Diana : Oh, God. If I should die, think only this of me: I played Tom Ballard chess while busting for a pee.
Tom : Well, go then.
Diana : I don't want to go; I'm just trying to stop my brain from totally atrophying while you make your next move.
Tom : Aah... No.
Diana : Oh. Strike him down! Come on, God, right now; poof, frizzle, pile o' dust!
Tom : You don't believe in God.
Diana : I'm getting desperate.
Tom : What's the hurry?
Diana : "At my back I always hear Time's wingéd chariot hurrying near." Andrew Marvell.
Tom : Was he related to Captain Marvel?
Diana : Will you just make your move, or I'll hide your teeth again.
Tom : I'm just about to. Keep your knickers in the untwisted position. Ha ha ha.
[makes a move]
Tom : Checkmate.
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Jane : Harvey would like to have a little word.
Diana : 'Cause he can't manage a big word?
Harvey Bains : Thank you, Diana, this is a serious matter, so if I could have your full attention, with no interruption.
Basil : Is it about the, uh, contraceptive machine in the gent's lavvy?
Harvey Bains : No, it is not! There is no such machine, Basil.
Basil : Precisely! And it's a disgrace. It's a four mile walk to the nearest chemist. And by the time you've been there and back you can't remember what you went for. And the other party's probably dead, anyway.
